Hey there!!!! Me again, guys!!! I hadn't forgotten you!!! ;D Thank you to everyone wh has been patient enough to read this until there!!! ;D BUT much more THANK YOU to all the wonderful people who have been kiiiiiiiind enough to review me till now!!! ;D ;D ;D Keep on doing this!!! ;D ;D
Here goes my chapter eight... just hope you won't all kill me right after you've read it... The next chapter will be my last one and I just wanted to add that I dedicate this story to all people who died or suffered from breasts cancer (or are still suffering) ... I wish Maggie Smith, the most wonderful actress of our time to not be in the first category, that is to say I wish her to fully recover as soon as possible, breastcancer making flu be nearly enjoyable if you compare....
Enough of this... enjoy the suffering of my little characters (well, JKR's, just borrowed in this story ;D)... MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! nyark nyark nyark...
Chapter VIII
"I wanna stop this treatment."
Her sentence fell sharply in the silence of the cancerologist's office, silence that had become depressive since every appointment had followed the other, bringing more pain, more sadness, more numbness each time. And from appointment to appointment to appointment, it had become the usual atmophere of the room. But today, her husband was there and it was even more saddening.
"I wanna stop this treatment."
She had told it, at last. She felt a weight leaving her chest and she released a breath she hadn't even been aware of holding. She had done it. She felt free. She felt living again. Then, she looked at him. Her husband. Husband. Even the word sounded strange to her ears. She had spent nearly 60 years wishing he was hers, and now, now that he was, now that she was free of spending her last times a she wished... She wasn't so sure anymore. Had she been too egoistical ? Would he stay with her during the time that was left ?
She turned her head to look at him. Albus, her straight, smart, kind, ever-childlike Albus. Albus with the twinkling sapphire eyes. Albus who could make her melt with one word, one smile, one touch, one kiss. Her Albus. Her Albus seemed defeated, defeated and so sad. His eyes, once the blue poles, always shining with mischief looked dull. Dull and haunted. And this was all because of her. If only she had kept on fighting. If only she had been braver, more courageous and had left in her native Highlands to die there. If only she had kept herself distant of him all these years. If only she hadn't come to Hogwarts, if only she hadn't been a witch, if only... No! she had to stop and face the pain she had created him.
He watched her tenderly as she turned her head to face him completely, face to face, eyes to eyes, emerald to sapphire. He frowned when he noticed she looked at him with that teary and apologetic look showing in her green depths. The one look he couldn't stand, the one look he couldn't bear because seeing her so distraught but burrying the pain was so painful, he nearly felt as he was physically injured."
He opened his mouth, wating to say somehting, but she cut him:
"Albus... I... I'm s-sorry... I-I didn't think of ..."
"No need to apologize, love. You know, I had reached the same conclusion myself... I-I just COULDN'T bear to see you this bad... "
"So... you really wanted me to go away and never come back to you?"
"NO! No, my angel" he said, cupping her tire face with both his hands "I never wante you to leave me, I could never live without you."
"So... why..."
"Because I wanted you to live agin, not just barely survive. I wanted to see your beautiful smile, to see your ever graceful moves, to... I... My dearest, you and you alone are my world, life without you is not life, it's just a painful survival... It's something... something I cannot even imagine..."
"I... So... you're not... angry with me?"
"No, my beloved kitten. I decided long ago that and you alone are the one to decide what to do or not to do with your life and that I would ever support you... Whatever your decision... I love you too much to let you suffer because of my stupidity if I can do otherwise..." he answered sincerely.
Sincerely... Yes, he was sincere, she could feel it in her heart and see it in his eyes. This brought tears in her eyes.
"Thank you, Albus"
"Whatever for, my dear?"
"For your understanding."
He took her in his arms and held her tight. Her head was on the crook of his neck, her hands on his chest and thus, she could feel his magic pulsing and his heart beating along with hers. And somehow, it calmed her down. He kissed her repetedly on the top of her head while gently stroking her hair (yes, fake hair, I haven't forget...) . She suddenly raised her head and their eyes locked, unconditionnal and absolute love shining through them.
Dr Collins felt as if he was intruding on somehting very private and turned read at this display of affection. The 35 years-old man had seen many couples, whose members were relaying on each other. He had seen a lot of displays of affection of all kind, from the shyest (the doctor was there after all) to the most... er-demonstrative (how would you have called people kissing each other mouthfully? -A/N: er... I don't reallt think this is the good term, if you know it please, tell me- This being the least demonstrative of all!) No... This was special. More intimate. Very contained, but in the same time so much deeper... He began to really feel lke a "voyeur" when they both began to lean in, their lips growing closer and closer...
"HUM HUM!!!!" He cleared his throat loudly and they reluctantly let go of each other, blushing. Phew!!!!! Over!!! His bad feeling left him, soon replaced by an other. He was really anguished about this. Sure, they had apparently decided to stop the treatment but... how would they react to the news he was bearing???... He swallowed anguishly before opening his mouth and beginning to speak, adressing this to them both:
"Sorry to interrupt you but... I have the results of your exams"
Minerva paled and automatically grabbed Albus' hand. She knew it was no good sign when a healer-or a doctor, in that case- hesitated. And Dr Collins looked defeated.
Albus was holding his breath. His wife had taken his hand by anguish. No good sign. And she had done it because a muggle doctor was hesitating on what was the best way to tell them results. Of Exams. Minerva's Exams. Even less good sign.
"How are... What do they say ?" asked Albus in a trembling voice.
"Well... that it's actually a good thing you've decided to cease the treatment, Mrs Dumbledore" he answered with a faintly smile.
"What... what do you mean ?" asked Minerva. It could not. No, it was impossible, no,he had to tell her there was still hope!!!
"I'm sorry... but you have metastases... your cancer is ... genera lized. You've been very brave, Madam, Sir, but... there's noghing we can do anymore... I'm really sorry"
"How long do I have ?" she slightly asked.
"Four months. Perhaps a little less, perhaps a little more."
She nodded:
"Goodbye, Dr Collins"
And then, they left.
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When in their chambers, reality came crashing down. Crashing their dreams, tearing it all away.
Albus was in a numb, but he shook his head. He knew his wife needed him right now.
Minerva had fallen on the floor. And there she laid, crying her soul away. She didn't want to leave him... Somehow, she had thought she would always be with him. That they would always be together. That him and his love would always stay with her, that they would follow her everywhere.But deep down, she realized, she had always known it would all finish that way: into tears and heartbreake. She knew that living with him was not something that would last. Too soon,she would open her eyes and the "dream" would be over. She had always know she didn't deserve him. She wasn't worth him. Not at all. He deserved someone else, someone nicer (Well, that is not difficult to find, she thought bitterly), someone healthier, younger, smarter and... much more beautiful than she could ever have been. When she wasn't there anymore he would be happier and he would...
The feel of two strong masculines arms holding her took her away from her thoughts to bring her were she belonged (and actually was): HIS arms.
"Minerva... Don't ever think your not worthy, love, because it's not true. You're worthy of anything. But above all else, angel, you deserve to be loved. "
"Albus..."
He grabbed one of her wrists and turned her so that she was facing him. He looked in his her teary eyes and said:
"Tabby, you're the only one woman I've ever really loved, the only one I ever will. And if a woman was ever worthy of love, my dear, that woman is you. Darling, you've given me and the wizarding world so much... How could you be unworthy of love ? Of my love? I promise you we'll always be together... cause when you'll go, I know I won't be long to follow..."
He kept onw whispering her sweet nothings while stroking her head and repetively kissing her face (forehead, temple,...) until she had calmed down. He, then, noticed she had fallen asleep in his arms, exhausted as she was... if he hadn't (by now) realised how emotionnally draining this day had been for her, he would never have.
He slightly smiled as he picked her up and carried her up in his arms to their bedroom. Lying on the bed beside her, he held her securedly in his arms, watching her sleep until he, too, was asleep. His last conscious thought as he drifted onto the world of sleep was that he was going to do with her everything she hadn't already done, he would help her say 'Goodbye' but above all of this, he would make sure she felt happy. Happy and loved.
tbc...
;D hehehe... so... yes, I know, this is not happy! Noooooooo!!! Don't kill me already!!! I'll do something short nice and happy after!!!!
Well... that is if you would be so kind to review me.... I feel lonely without little reviews to make my day... (note: good or bad, it makes my day!!! review is such a wooooooooonderful thing!!! ) ;D ;D
;D hehehe... so... yes, I know, this is not happy! Noooooooo!!! Don't kill me already!!! I'll do something short nice and happy after!!!! 
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