Fuadiddles.

[Taylor]

Summery :What happens When a duel demonstration goes wrong and why it all came to that moment.

Rating- Teen. Some minor language.

Fuadiddles.

Chapter One.

The room fell silent. The entire board sat in speechless horror as the smoke cleared from the center of the dueling area. Cornelius Fudge was the first to make a sound- a gasping wheeze snort that made every board member look at him as if he had lost his head, then as noises began to come from the center of the dueling area, as a collective they turned their heads, stood up and leaned over the table to look at what lay before them.

Minerva had spoken the spell. Some would say later that some spells in close quarters should never be done, None had ever heard that spell spoken before- reading it , and knowing the after math were one thing but none could remember anyone daring to say the spell that she had shouted during the heat of the duel- for it had passed from being a demonstration to a wounding of pride, to- this...

Quite honestly none of them could recall exactly if it was the sneeze that Albus had placed on her the moment she had said the spell that did it or if it was her Scottish pronunciation that may have taken the spell beyond what it was supposed to be. As the board members stood with their jaws dragging on the floor they heard a squeak come from Albus- He could breath at least- and the squeak sounded like a plea for help.

Cornelius made the sound again. His face was bright purple as if he was ready to explode. Amelia Bones clapped him on the back several times hoping that if he happened to be choking on the horrid lemon drops Albus had placed for safe keeping beside Fudge that the blow would dislodge it. What followed though was not a cough, but a high pitched giggle from him. Tears began to flow as he hung onto the the table for support. His entire body shook with at first the silent laughter, then with bellows that filled the entire board room.

Minerva gazed at Fudge from behind electric pink and purple hair that was matted in dreadlocks. If her tongue wasn't stretching out snapping up fly at that particular moment she would have used a select hex to hang him naked in front of a church choir during a practice session of an exorcism.

She had vowed to get Albus for what he had done. She just didn't count on- this...

[Taylor]

The flutter of wings behind the staff table at breakfast time caused a few heads to turn and regard the tawny frog mouth owl that struggled with the over sized parchment. A few teachers groaned. They knew the owl, they knew the seal from the undersecretary of the ministry of magic, and they knew that an arrival at any time other than the regular mail couldn't be good.

the owl landed headfirst in Albus's near empty bowl of porridge. It fell back on its tail feathers with milk and the porridge sticking to its face. It shook itself- sending the sticky goo flying in all directions. Severus Snape found several clumps of it sticking in his hair, and a particularly large glob hit his nose. Prof Flitwick, while smaller than the others received a blob on his reading glasses. Pomona Sprout had been very careful that morning for breakfast- quite proud of herself that she hadn't split a single drop of anything on her, found a gooey mass had hit her dead center of the middle of her ample chest.

Albus had simply decided, full well knowing that it was going to happen someday, that he was going to ignore the mail until he was finished with his breakfast. Realizing that his staff was now wearing his breakfast, he reached forward and untied the scroll from the owls leg. For a moment he could have sworn that the owl had sighed in relief. It didn't take off right away, rather choosing to dip its beak in the remains of the porridge and take a nibble of the bit that was still in the bowl.

"Perhaps it awaits a reply" said Minerva who, by shear dumb luck had avoided the onslaught of flying porridge.
Albus at that very moment felt something inside of him. She knew darn well what the letter was, who it was from and why he was avoiding opening it. The other staff members were looking at him now, the owl was wandering up and down the table trying to steal bits of toasts and getting its head stuck in the jam jar. Albus's hand hesitated over the scroll, Once opened he was committed to following through with what ever was inside.

It wasn't that he was afraid of doing it. Quite the contrary. There was little that he was afraid of it was just that it would undoubtedly take up much of his time to prove, or disprove something for the Sr undersecretary of the ministry of magic- something that they already knew, but were determined to make his life miserable.

"JUST OPEN THE BLOODY THING!" Screamed Snape who was fighting for his kippers in a tug of war with the owl.
Realizing that he had no desire to eat a kipper that an owl had chewed on in the first place he let the owl win and shoved it off the table. It squawked as it hit the floor with a thud. Snape resisted the urge to drop kick it across the great hall.

Albus took a moment to suck air through his teeth and tongue to remove a outside hull that was stuck between his molars. He knew the moment he opened the letter all thoughts of a pleasant breakfast were done. Minerva cleared her throat, reminding him that the breakfast had stopped being pleasant for the rest of them the moment the owl had alighted upon the table.
He couldn't be upset with the owl of course, but the person next to him who was giving his knee a nudge to open the damn thing and get done with it- well, if he wasn't going to have a good breakfast- nether would she... He felt better with that decision in a perverse way. What ever task that the letter held, he was determined now that Minerva would share in its glory, or misery.

Smiling brightly at Minerva he reached for the scroll and opened it. Something in his smile brought the cream she had just had with her porridge to a slow curdle in the ball of her stomach. She should have left well enough alone but she knew Albus, and she knew who the letter was from and the last time that he ignored one it was followed by three howlers, one of which had been opened in her office and it took weeks to clean the soot that resulted from it catching most of her her beloved books on fire. While the books were rescued, her ginger newts would never be the same.

She heard him catch his breath, then look at his watch and transforming his napkin into a scrap of parchment, he wrote two names and then called the owl who now had its head stuck through Hagrids massive piece of toast like a necklace and could barley waddle from the food it had consumed in the time that it was waiting.
No, not waddle- tottered as if it was drunk. Albus looked up and down the staff table. He saw the bright gleam of mischief in Flitwicks eyes as the owl headed back for his goblet again and stuck his head in the bottom of it, then gave a satisfied burp before falling back wards on the table with its wings outstretched and snoring gently.

"I dare say the owl is in no condition to fly back at this time... poor thing is exhausted with the weight of the original message... may take hours for it to recover..." sighed Albus as he made a note on the parchment, and placed the time of his response on it, then tied it to the owls leg. The staff rose as one, breakfast was over, Not that they would press Albus for details of the letter, that would come soon enough.

"Professor McGonagall... A moment please?"

The rest of the staff took a mis step on their way out the door. Even with the students about - and this was just staff as the students were home for the summer- he called her Minerva. Madam Hooch gave Severus shoulder a soft nudge as she guided her fellow teachers out the door. She knew Albus well enough that when he called Minerva by her title all hell was going to break loose and while it may be enlightening for some to observe, she had bore witness to several of the escapades, and didn't wish to get involved if she could avoid it at all costs.

Snape had read her thoughts. After the kipper incident, he was using great haste to exit the room. If it wasn't for the slow poke Pomona who was trying to overhear what was going to happen and clean her top at the same time he would have seen Hagrid who was concerned for the wee owl turn back to see if it was ok.

No one ever gets through Hagrid. Some have tried, all have failed. Snape found Flitwick struggling to breath between he and Hagrid- at least he hoped that was what Flitwick was doing thrashing about in his billowing black robes. Snape found himself pulling back with the taste of dead ferret in his mouth. Not that he personally would know what dead ferret would taste like, but he knew Hagrid had taken to wearing a ferret bag to keep his stuff in, and that happened to be what his open mouth came in contact with when Hagrid had turned to head back into the great hall for the owl.

"GEROOFFF ME! GEROOFFF ME!!" squeaked Flitwick in a panic.

Madam Hooch and Prof Sprout took a moment to untangle everyone and convince Hagrid the owl would be fine for right now, and in a rush got them out of the great hall, into the main stair case area and closed the doors.

"But- e may be urt..." stammered Hagrid.
"He will be fine Hagrid, but if I get drafted into what ever was in that scroll you will be picking Mandrakes out of your underwear for the next century!" hissed Pomona. "NOW MOVE YER ARSE!" she snapped shoving him to the outside door.

[Taylor]

"Professor McGonagall a moment please?"

'CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP!' thought Minerva as she stopped in mid stride. She saw the others pile up at the door and Madam Hooch and Professor Sprout get every one out with post haste. 'CRAP!' she thought again.

She closed her mind. It wouldn't do to have Albus see exactly what she was thinking of at that particular moment. She turned.

"Yes Professor Dumbledore?" she said smiling sweetly. Two could play at this.

"After reviewing the contents of the scroll, I have discovered that I require assistance on this particular task, and I feel it is in the best interest of the school for you to be just that person."

"No, thank you." She said taking a step as she turned to retreat the hall.
"It isn't an option." he said dryly.

"It isn't in my job description to cater to that woman ether." she snapped. "Nor is it in yours."

"It is a request from the board of governors to re qualify Hog warts as a school."

"BALDERDASH!" she thundered. "That letter came from HER! not the governors- "

"As Sr undersecretary to the minister of magic, they have the authority to have a review of the certification process, and have requested a demonstration of some of the skills we are teaching the students. It has been brought up that the students are learning - everything they could, and they feel it may be in the teaching methods...As you are the deputy headmistress of this school and a teacher... you will be attending the demonstration with me."

"Which is, what pray tell?" she asked with her arms folded over her chest.

"A duel"

"I am not the dueling master here- Flitwick is."

"Yes, he is, but the point that I will be making is that any of my teachers can take over and teach properly any of the courses at hand. I have informed them we will be there before tea today."

Minerva blinked and looked back at the bird.
"But, - the bird- he won't get there until just before tea even if he wakes now..."

Albus shrugged. "Can it be helped if we arrived and they were not prepared? All of them will of course be anxious to have tea, so the demonstration will be thankfully very short."

"Albus, You are 150 yrs old. I am half your age. Most of the spells that are used in proper dueling would break ether one of our bones if we landed wrong. What were they thinking? Let alone the danger of a stray spell bouncing off the walls- someone could get hurt!"

He looked at her over his spectacles. "Professor McGonagall, We are both professionals. There is little danger to those watching as we both know how to control our spells. However, if you do feel that it might happen, please aim for the Sr undersecretary of the Minister of Magic..."

Minerva left the great hall and sighed. She had no desire to ride by thestrial or travel by floo powder which would be the fastest way, but the mess yest, She had no desire to spend high tea casting hexes at Albus. She did have a feeling that unless they both did something pretty impressive that they would continue to get the parchments at breakfast.

She blinked. A smile came upon her lips.
She was, after all the transfiguration teacher. As was he.

She hurried to her office and opened her book of great spells. She needed something that he hadn't heard of. Something that was harmless, yet, would - prove- they knew what they were doing.

She flipped thought the pages glancing at her notes. She hadn't needed to duel for century's. She knew that Albus was quite capable. He had fought Voldemort several times and she- while she was an order member, he had kept her out of the way- safe from harm so that there would always be someone at the school to protect the children.

She slammed the book closed in frustration. She needed to practice- was horrible out of practice and had only one thing she could do.

Ten minutes later she was knocking on the door of Flitwicks office. he didn't answer. She supposed he knew who was there, and didn't want to become involved. She cleared her throat.

"It's no use hiding Filius, I can still transform you through the door..."

She heard a defeated sigh as the door was opened. She looked at Filius and said softly bending over to his ear.

"I need your help to beat the tar out of ..."

Filius looked at her with shock and awe, then pulled her inside.

[Taylor]

Albus was pacing in his office. Of course Minerva was right. At their age, dueling was dangerous. He knew the bird had taken off half an hour ago, still wearing the giant toast about its neck pecking at it as it flew. No doubt it needed the strength. He had been very careful to send a copy of the parchment back, not the original which he kept secure in a time jar. He had his suspicions as to what was going on, but couldn't say to Minerva. It was well enough that she had agreed. He needed an edge in this, something- that would allow him to convince the board to end this nonsense.

He hastened his stride down the hall to Flitwicks office , but heard Minerva's voice inside speaking to Filius. Well, that was better than he had hoped- Which left him...

Five minutes later he found himself stunning a Venomous Testicular to get into Pomona's office. How the Plant could have moved itself to block the door - though- her plants did anything she told them too.

She looked up- she was re potting a mandrake. He clapped his hands over his ears just in time as the mandrake let out a shrill scream.
She held it up in the air almost longer than necessary before plunging it into a pot and covering it with soil, He waited until it stopped screaming and then pointed his wand at all of them gave a silencing charm to quiet them.

"Pomona I require your assistance..." He saw her reach for another pot but he stopped her and removed her ear muffs.
"No, don't worry, I am not taking you to the ministry office with me, however I do require your assistance..."

It was several hours later that Albus and Minerva met in his office and stood before the fire place. She was still steamed at him for getting her into this, and he was as well for her goading him into opening the scroll.

He shoved several bags of sweets in his pockets. At least he would have something that would bring him comfort later on.

They arrived at the ministry just in time to see the tawny frog mouthed owl wobble in to the office area and then collapse in a heap, its little belly stuffed with the toast it had eaten on the way. Minerva and Albus were signed in and on the way down the elevator while they saw the note being removed and the owl getting up and sticking its head into the coffee mug of the Post owl master.

There was no one in the room when they arrived. Albus looked at his watch and smiled. They were just on time,

In the singular light he regarded Minerva. She was beautiful. exquisite. an angel.

she was also upset with him.
that made her the second most dangerous being in all of Scotland. or england.

[Alesia]

Okay you got me. There is more right? I had trouble is the transition from the present duel to the morning of but otherwise it is intriguing.

I say again, there is more right? PLEASE ;D

[Taylor]

"Shall we give them, 10 minutes and then depart?" Albus asked carefully. He saw Minerva pull out her wand and examine the end of it She tilted her head and with a sweep of her wrist the room had changed to the dueling floor. Another sweep and the tables moved around so the spectators would be unharmed should a spell bounce.

"Oh, lets be generous and give them half an hour. There is MUCH we need to discuss Headmaster." she said flexing her wand in her hand.

' Breath... very important to breath' thought Albus.
' the fact she called him Headmaster was paramount to the amount of anger she had boiling with in. Albus when they were together, ALBUS DUMBLEDORE when she had been on the receiving end of one of his tart sweets, (after she managed to get her breath back) Professor Dumbledore when she refereed to him for one of the children- or if she was extremal upset with him, the last time being when he had been caught buying jokes from Fred and George and had intended to exchange a fake wand for her own right before class. but- HEADMASTER...He had to think positive that she wouldn't kill him in front of whitenesses.'

"Misery loves company" he said brightly.
"So, your miserable around me?" she said, blinking back what he thought were tears. her voice had a tone of hurt. He was about to explain when they heard a click of the door and the entire board entered along with Fudge and his Sr undersecretary who looked much like the frog mouthed owl she owned.

"Well, I can see that were all ready, " his Sr undersecretary said smiling sweetly. Albus resisted the same urge that Severus had with the owl. Instead he walked over to the minister and began to empty out his pockets.

"Could you keep these safe for me? there's a good chap" albus had said piling up several bags of different sweets on top of other things - string, a confiscated skiff box treat, a fake wand- a wind up frog that gave hops now and then, several stray Bertie botts every flavored bean and the last thing, a small hourglass that held a tiny object within.

"What's all this?" asked fudge clearly overwhelmed with the amount of things before him - clearly some of it had to have shrunk in the pockets because Albus hadn't come in with a bushel basket under his arm.

"Oh, they are Muggle sweets. You can try the one in the brown bag, but I would avoid the blue bag, I am not sure exactly what they are made of..."
Albus turned back to Minerva.

"If your ready Professor Mc Gonagall?" he said politely
"Certainly Headmaster" she said formally.
'I am so dead...' thought Albus.

The two met at the center, and bowed, tipped their wands and walked away . On the count of three they turned, both casting their spells.

Minerva was quicker, owing to how angry she was with Albus she ducked as she cast her spell and it caught him in the mid section below his belt.

[glow=red,2,300]"Beaujolais!" [/glow]she thundered.
[glow=blue,2,300]"amuse-bouche" [/glow]he managed to say just before her spell hit him.

something cold ran down his leg. He heard the gasps from the board members as they saw something dark red running from under his robes.

He stood there, looking down, realizing that the red liquid was coming from him.

[glow=red,2,300]"Fromage et pain." [/glow]Minerva said with out waiting for him to recover. His outer robes transformed with a thud, falling to the floor. He stood in his union suit that had a gryffindore lion for a codpiece and a bunny tail for the back flap.

fortunately for albus his underwear was dark red and his back was turned to the group so they couldn't see where the red liquid was coming from. Minerva saw a glint in his eyes that met hers.

[glow=blue,2,300]"caisse de panier!" [/glow]he managed in between the spell to stop the spell she had cast on him to make him void the liquid.

Minerva gasped as two mid sized baskets took the place of her foundation garment. It gave him time to get redressed and he happened to look up to see her front get very square and the horrified look she had on her face as several of the men of the board began to snicker.

he was so dead...

Yes there is more coming probably tonight after work.. defiantly tomorrow presuming the power holds out with the hurricane coming...

[palanfanaiel]

Thank merlin, more's on the way!! This is THE best duelling story between Dumbly and McGee so far, it really caught my attention, and left me laughing, and in a most wonderful mood. Thank you
Can't wait for more... *Looks eagerly on her computerscreen...*
Pal ;D

[BlazeFourPaws]

Oh please more I love this so much. It is awesome duel. Albus is so much trouble.

[Taylor]

(Well I had hoped to update last night and I fell asleep over the lap top and when I woke it was midnight, and not thinking, I closed the program and went to sleep only to realize when I woke that I had lost an hour worth of writing... But I am off today, and as long as the battery holds out while I am doing things in between writing, things should be fine... On with the story...)

The Sr undersecretary leaned over and whispered something into Fudges ear while Minerva took a breath and reversed the spell as Albus goggled at what he had done. There was a righteous anger on her face- No one fills her baskets unless she allowed them, and Albus Dumbledore did NOT have her permission. He could see that, He could see her seething beneath the surface. He also had heard a snatch of the sr undersecretary’s comment.

But Minerva was what he had to deal with, most apparently.
[glow=blue,2,300]"Gobbstoppersous"[/glow]

Thousands of tiny round balls began to rain down on Minerva. She knew better than to move to try to avoid them, they were all over the floor if she took a step she would fall.

[glow=red,2,300]"Morsure sur votre âne de bulle[/glow]she said under her breath as she side kicked a section of the round objects across the floor at him. She didn't get any pleasure from when he jumped straight up in the air 4 feet clutching his backside or when he came down and slipped and fell on the round things. What hit the ground though, was something that stretched the limits of his robes. He found himself elevated as iff he was sitting on a chair, yet he could feel- the hard round gobstoppers under him.

In the background a snatch from a rap song waived through the hall
"I like big butts and I can not lie
You other sisters can't deny
That when a guy walks in with an itty bitty waste
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung
Wanna pull up front..."
(note, because this is NOT in the lemon section the song will go no further, but- for the adults in the group go to www.lyricsstyle.com/s/sirmixalot/babygotback.html for the full lyrics and let me know if you would like a lemon version...)

Albus's ears went pink. He struggled to get on his feet with his beach ball sized backside but it was proving to be difficult. He saw Minerva glance over at the table where Fudge was sitting and her eyes narrowed- it was just the distraction that he needed.

[glow=blue,2,300]"Plumes d'oie" [/glow]he said with a gasp- "[glow=blue,2,300]Langue de grenouille"[/glow]

Something unexpected happened - unexpected to Albus - as the feathers that he had summoned to cover her body just changed her beautiful raven hair into long shocking pink dreadlocks that hung past her chin and swayed as a long tongue flicked out and snatched a gobstopper then spit it out.

He should have realized that Minerva was accomplished in both wordless magic, and wandless.

[glow=red,2,300]"peu de poteau!" [/glow]she managed past her tongue. The men on the board gasped, the women tittered. All that was needed was the reaffirming glance that her spell had worked.

Was that tears he saw in her eyes? He tried to read her feelings, but was blocked.

[glow=blue,2,300]"grand nez d'éléphant"[/glow]

Her ears began to grow- Something was tampering with his spells. "S--" he started trying to warn her not to cast another spell. It was too late. He heard her voice resound through out the room

[glow=red,2,300]"Fuadiddles!"[/glow]

"Oh dear" he managed to say before there was an explosion upon the dueling floor...

[Taylor]

The room fell silent. The entire board sat in speechless horror as the smoke cleared from the center of the dueling area. Cornelius Fudge was the first to make a sound- a gasping wheeze snort that made every board member look at him as if he had lost his head, then as noises began to come from the center of the dueling area, as a collective they turned their heads, stood up and leaned over the table to look at what lay before them

Cornelius made the sound again. His face was bright purple as if he was ready to explode. Amelia Bones clapped him on the back several times hoping that if he happened to be choking on the horrid lemon drops Albus had placed for safe keeping beside Fudge that the blow would dislodge it. What followed though was not a cough, but a high pitched giggle from him. Tears began to flow as he hung onto the the table for support. His entire body shook with at first the silent laughter, then with bellows that filled the entire board room.


. Minerva gazed at Fudge from behind electric pink and purple hair that was matted in dreadlocks. If her tongue wasn't stretching out snapping up fly at that particular moment she would have used a select hex to hang him naked in front of a church choir during a practice session of an exorcism.

The Sr undersecretary to Fudge stood up and walked around the table to the dueling floor.

"How unfortunate..." she said then returned to Fudge and leaning forward whispered something to him. His laugher had stopped, he was still purple, his eyes bright.

Minerva couldn't move. Albus couldn't for that matter ether. Their body's had been thrown together- merged. She could taste the remnants of the sherbet lemon in his mouth, he could taste the fly that she just swallowed. While it would have been a disadvantage for two who were seriously dueling to be tossed together, it had its advantages today. Nether could move beyond a wobble, each mind had its own idea of what to do. Yes the spell wasn't permanent- he hoped, he poked in Minerva's mind to see if it was- and received a mental slap for peaking at her memory of getting dressed in the morning. Her tongue came out again and picked up one of the marble things. It was a muggle candy. She should have known he would want something to take the taste of fly away- at least this was sweet...

There was something else- she had been so busy with trying to stay upright her large ears nearly missed it- it was the Sr undersecretary telling Fudge that she had allowed the duel with whitenesses so that what ever gripes they had against each other could be worked out- but alas they had only pr oven that they were to unstable to be effective as Headmaster and Deputy Headmistress.

'Merlin's beard!' she thought to herself. Albus calmed her. he had suspected as much. All the times that he had been called, to explain simple things, now this- the other board members were deep in discussion of how to safely get them to st mungos- which Minerva knew would be the last place that they would ever see if the Sr undersecretary had anything to say about it...

"Time" Albus said in a muffled whisper. Minerva's arm was growing out the side of his nose and her foot was lodged in his throat. Minerva looked around as best as she could- the dreadlocks were growing longer. Her eyes fell on the time piece that Albus had placed on the desk in front of the minister of magic.

She watched helpless as Amalia Bones tried to walk across the dueling floor but ended up on her backside. They were afraid to do anything to reverse the spell.

'stop time' she had heard Albus in her head.

Now if only her tongue would reach...

(OK. I have seven chapters here and only THREE people have said they had read it but its been read over 85 times. A couple of reviews just about now would be stellar... if you want to read more, I got to know if you like it or not...

so no more num nums until I get a couple more reviews!
Btw, the spell checker doesn't seem to be working...)

Taylor

[tanja]

Very Funny!!! Min with pink hear...just great!!looking forward to how they´ll manage...

[palanfanaiel]

HAR-HAR-HAR! THis is hilarious!

[glow=red,2,300]MORE[/glow]

P

[Alesia]

I am one of the three but I don't care..........

more please ;D

[TheGryffindorSeeker]

lol more please loving it

[caridwen]

of course we like it, we love it ;D! Give us more! NOW!!!

[Taylor]

"Didn't I warn you something like this would happen Minister?" Minerva heard a shrill voice that got on her last nerve. Through the pink dreadlocks she managed to gaze at the Sr undersecretary with contempt. Warn him did she? about what?

The position of their heads gave Albus access to her thoughts. "Time... must stop" he had gasped to her.

For a moment Minerva didn't know, and then, shoved aside by the Sr undersecretary was the bags of candy, and-

was that really what she thought it was?

Her long tongue snaked out but missed the small hourglass. It stuck against a few of the lemon drops that had fallen out of the bag. She groaned. the only thing else that was worse than the tongue touching the lemon drops was... (she groaned again, then yelped with pain as the Sr undersecretary had slammed down her hands on the table trapping Minerva's long tongue under her pudgy ring covered fingers.

' my tongue will never be the same...' bemoaned Minerva.

[Taylor]

Minerva was at least pleased to hear the Sr. undersecretary yelp of disgust as she wrapped her tongue around her fingers and squeezed. She dearly hoped that the foul woman would not think to yank her tongue, though there were worse things. The Sr undersecretary raised her hand and started to scream, thrashing herself about as if a thousand bugs had crawled over her body. She couldn't even look at Minerva and Albus, they had become- things...

"This is exactly what I mean Cornelius!" she screamed hysterical.

Eyebrows went up among the others. Amelia Bones cleared her throat. Fudge looked a tad uncomfortable at the now known familiarity between them.

Minerva's tongue snicked out again and managed to grasp the small hourglass. The Sr Undersecretary made a grab for her tongue then, to stop her- the undersecretary's eyes were wild with anger, and realizing what it was, with dismay and fright.
"Aut Ow?" Minerva asked out loud. But she could only make out from Albus "Stop Time" Minerva gasped as the Sr Undersecretary managed to grab the hourglass from her- a triumphant gaze on her face. Minerva lashed out her tongue one more time and wrapped around the womans horrid pudgy ankles. The Sr Undersecretary screamed and fell back wards the hourglass flying out of her hands in an upward spiral to land in front of Fudge-

and shatter.

Minerva groaned. Not only had the Sr. Undersecretary not shaved her legs, she hadn't washed in a while ether. spitting out the leg hairs, Minerva's tongue sought out one of the bags of lemon drops and wrapped her tongue around a few and drew them into her mouth.

Fudge looked at the broken hourglass, and the small object that was inside of it. It grew- and expanded, and when it was done, he adjusted his glasses and looked at the parchment before him, then up at Minerva who's eyes told him that there was something else going on.

She sighed and rolled her tongue in past the legs that stuck out from under her cloths. They weren't her legs. they were Albus's hairy legs. She found her wand and lifted it high with her tongue. Taking a breath she thought to herself [glow=red,2,300]"Finites Incantation." [/glow]there was a sucking sound as her body, and Albus's re arranged and became whole again. In everything that she had read and studied, the effects that happened to them were not of the spell, but of something else.

The Sr Undersecretary hadn't moved. She had landed hard on the Gobstoppers and was softly whimpering in pain. Minerva felt no pity for her.


"What is the meaning of this??" thundered Fudge.

[Jessabelle]

ohhhhh please please post more soon .. this is very good! I am a bit confused about the whole hourglass thing .. please post and explain!

[Taylor]

"I believe it explains itself Minster..." said Albus walking to the front of the room where the board was now crowded about Fudge trying to read the parchment.

Fudge glanced over the parchment the looked up at Albus with confusion. "I didn't request any such thing!" he said. He looked at the broken hour glass. It had preserved the parchment a few moments after it had been opened. Albus gently took fudges fingers and held it ,and the parchment up to the light. It had other writing on that was evident when it was held to the light. Fudge realized the parchment had been written with disappearing/ re appearing ink.

Fudge stepped back from the parchment as if it had burnt him, he went around the table and stood in front of the sr undersecretary and placed his hands on his hips. "All this time you said there was dissention between the two of them.! there was nothing of the sort!

"Somebody HAD to do something to bring - out what they are into the light!." she shrieked.

"What they are??" asked Amelia Bones with her voice rising to anger. "What they are - are the best teacher and head master that Hogwarts has had in century’s!

Albus collected his things and stuffed them back into his pocket.

"Best teachers? they couldn’t even control the effects during a simple Duel!" shrieked the Sr undersecretary.

"Oh, I don't know..." said Albus as he pointed his wand at hers as it lay on the ground. the spell [glow=green,2,300]corps brouillés[/glow] came out of the wand. Some of the gobbstoppers mixed with the fallen lemon drops.

"Minister, I trust this will not happen again??" snapped Minerva, a bit more miffed than ether of them had ever seen her.

"No, No, of course not. Our deepest apologies, you can return back to Hogwarts..."

there was a nervous giggle from the floor "No harm done. heh,,,"

Minerva turned, and a few of the pink dreadlocks whipped around her face as she did. Her eyes narrowed as she bore down upon the Sr Undersecretary with frightening certainty. The Sr Undersecretary screamed then scrambled under the table, hugging onto the Ministers leg for protection. Minerva could see Albus was still collecting his things especially the mutated Lemon drops and did not see the Sr undersecretary mouth a single word to Minerva. He heard a low feral growl from her and decided he could live with out the rest of the stuff.

While Fudge tried everything to dislodge his sr undersecretary, Albus took Minerva's arm and guided her up to the street level.

"What now, m' dear? tea at the leaky cauldron? We can catch the Hogwarts express and be back at the school by the morning...Minerva shook her head tight lipped.
"No? alright then." he put out his wand and lit it. With a BANG the purple night bus appeared.

"Come along Minerva, it will be fun... Oh, Hello Stan, Ernie, How are you today?" said Albus-

Minerva made her way to her seat. ' fun' while she did know the meaning of it, didn't include the looks from people as she tried to hide her shocking pink dreadlocks under her hat.

he was sooo going to pay...

the end,,,

of this story.
There is, however a sequel to this started in the Lemons section. I have a plan to post part of this story, or continue it in every section that this board has.
Warning. Lemon will be very tart. Not for youngsters. Sorry!!

Please Read and review. ( I live for reviews! its the only way that I can know if its flat, or fluffy! )
(humming "I like big butts and I can not lie...)

[BlazeFourPaws]

Claps. Superb. Please keep such ingenius effects going. I love Min's dreads.

[Jessabelle]

good story!

[Mellypoo622]

Hahahhaha! I love it!

[palanfanaiel]

Pal amat Fuadiddlem... Heh heh! This was hysterically funny.. ;D

[emeraldeyes]

I loved it!! Soooo funny!! Good job!!!

[JoanneM]

This story was really great ... I read the sequel first, as I had trouble find this one *twinkle* It is just hilarious ... I love Min's pink hair ... *yaya*

[ismaco]

I read this story when you wrote it but now that you're writing a sequel in every board I read it again. I loved your story... is really hilarious! I'll R&R the sequels!

[mmadfabulous]

fuadiddles:)) good stuff