Post by tabbykit on Aug 10, 2007 9:51:14 GMT -5
I was in the mood to write some humor, so here is the outcome! Not finished yet, and not exactly sure where I am going to take it, but you are welcome to come along for the ride. Reviews used to fuel the ship.........
It is mid-summer at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The students are gone, the castle cleaned, and the Headmaster and his Deputy are currently enjoying a quiet afternoon in his office.
Thwap.
Thwap.
Thwap.
Thwap-thud.
Thwap.
“Albus?”
Thwap.
“Yes Minerva?”
Thwap- thud
“What are you doing?”
“Throwing a tennis ball against the wall.” He answered as if it were obvious.
Thwap.
“Could you possibly stop that?”
“Possibly.”
Thwap-thud-thwap.
Minerva ground her teeth. “Will you please stop that?”
“I did!” He protested. “ The last one was clearly a thwap-thud-thwap. The other ones were all thwaps, or thwap-thuds.” Minerva stared at Albus.
“Bonkers. Absolutely bonkers.” She murmured.
Thwap.
Thwap-thud.
Thwap—Smack!
“Ow!” Albus turned toward Minerva and glared at her incredulously. “You smacked me!”
Minerva raised a perfectly arched eyebrow. “I did no such thing. I have been sitting here attempting to read the entire time.” Albus opened his mouth as if to say something but then thought better of it.
Thwap.
Thwap.
Thwap-thud.
Thwap-thud-thwap—Smack!
“OW! Minerva!”
“Albus, I assure you I have not laid a hand on you.”
“Humph. You could at least kiss it and make it better. That last one hurt!”
“I don’t think so.”
Albus frowned. “Fine.” Standing up he walked over to where Minerva was sitting. “What are you reading?”
“Advanced theory in transfiguration. I read it once a year, just to remind myself of the basics.”
“Basics? Dear, those are not normally considered basics……”
Minerva blinked at him. “They are for me.”
“And I am the one who is bonkers?”
“Yes. There is no question about that.”
Albus sighed and dejectedly looked around his office. “Dear, there is nothing to do.”
“Reading is a verb you know.” Minerva murmered.
Albus frowned. “What do verbs have to do with anything?”
“Verbs are action words, which implies doing something.” Minerva turned the page. Albus stood up and wandered over to the ten foot tall book shelf. Standing there for about three and a half seconds he turned back to Minerva.
“I have nothing to read.”
Minerva glanced up from her book. “I, however, do.” Returning her attention to her book, she turned another page. Albus sighed again, and returned to his chair.
Thwap.
Thwap-thud.
Thwap—Smack!
“Blast it! Minerva!” Albus jumped up from his chair and glared at the raven haired witch.
“Albus, I have already told you that I have not raised my hand to you!” Minerva glared at him a moment before once again attempting to read her book. Albus rubbed the back of his head, thinking. After a moment he wandered over to the chair Minerva was sitting in. Inspecting every inch of the area around her, he returned to his chair and sat down.
Thwap.
Albus looked around quickly after catching the ball. Nothing happened, so he shrugged and threw it again.
Thwap.
This time Albus jumped up and whirled around, to make sure that Minerva had not moved. The Transfiguration Mistress was still sitting calmly in her chair slowly turning the pages as her eyes rapidly scanned them. Albus narrowed his eyes at her while he tossed the ball without looking.
Thwap—Smack!
Albus stood there stunned. Minerva had not moved an inch. “Minerva? Dear, I think my office is haunted.”
Minerva once more glanced up from her book. “Whatever gave you that idea?”
“You are not the one smacking me.” He replied fearfully.
It is mid-summer at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The students are gone, the castle cleaned, and the Headmaster and his Deputy are currently enjoying a quiet afternoon in his office.
Thwap.
Thwap.
Thwap.
Thwap-thud.
Thwap.
“Albus?”
Thwap.
“Yes Minerva?”
Thwap- thud
“What are you doing?”
“Throwing a tennis ball against the wall.” He answered as if it were obvious.
Thwap.
“Could you possibly stop that?”
“Possibly.”
Thwap-thud-thwap.
Minerva ground her teeth. “Will you please stop that?”
“I did!” He protested. “ The last one was clearly a thwap-thud-thwap. The other ones were all thwaps, or thwap-thuds.” Minerva stared at Albus.
“Bonkers. Absolutely bonkers.” She murmured.
Thwap.
Thwap-thud.
Thwap—Smack!
“Ow!” Albus turned toward Minerva and glared at her incredulously. “You smacked me!”
Minerva raised a perfectly arched eyebrow. “I did no such thing. I have been sitting here attempting to read the entire time.” Albus opened his mouth as if to say something but then thought better of it.
Thwap.
Thwap.
Thwap-thud.
Thwap-thud-thwap—Smack!
“OW! Minerva!”
“Albus, I assure you I have not laid a hand on you.”
“Humph. You could at least kiss it and make it better. That last one hurt!”
“I don’t think so.”
Albus frowned. “Fine.” Standing up he walked over to where Minerva was sitting. “What are you reading?”
“Advanced theory in transfiguration. I read it once a year, just to remind myself of the basics.”
“Basics? Dear, those are not normally considered basics……”
Minerva blinked at him. “They are for me.”
“And I am the one who is bonkers?”
“Yes. There is no question about that.”
Albus sighed and dejectedly looked around his office. “Dear, there is nothing to do.”
“Reading is a verb you know.” Minerva murmered.
Albus frowned. “What do verbs have to do with anything?”
“Verbs are action words, which implies doing something.” Minerva turned the page. Albus stood up and wandered over to the ten foot tall book shelf. Standing there for about three and a half seconds he turned back to Minerva.
“I have nothing to read.”
Minerva glanced up from her book. “I, however, do.” Returning her attention to her book, she turned another page. Albus sighed again, and returned to his chair.
Thwap.
Thwap-thud.
Thwap—Smack!
“Blast it! Minerva!” Albus jumped up from his chair and glared at the raven haired witch.
“Albus, I have already told you that I have not raised my hand to you!” Minerva glared at him a moment before once again attempting to read her book. Albus rubbed the back of his head, thinking. After a moment he wandered over to the chair Minerva was sitting in. Inspecting every inch of the area around her, he returned to his chair and sat down.
Thwap.
Albus looked around quickly after catching the ball. Nothing happened, so he shrugged and threw it again.
Thwap.
This time Albus jumped up and whirled around, to make sure that Minerva had not moved. The Transfiguration Mistress was still sitting calmly in her chair slowly turning the pages as her eyes rapidly scanned them. Albus narrowed his eyes at her while he tossed the ball without looking.
Thwap—Smack!
Albus stood there stunned. Minerva had not moved an inch. “Minerva? Dear, I think my office is haunted.”
Minerva once more glanced up from her book. “Whatever gave you that idea?”
“You are not the one smacking me.” He replied fearfully.