Bye-bye

[max]

Catwoman's locking of a thread once more shows me that the members of this board aren't up to discussing differing opinions like sensible adults. I still think Rikki owes Angharad an apology, but obviously I'm not supported in this by the moderators. Therefore, I'm leaving the board now. So long - and thanks for all the fish!

Max

[tanja]

Well, I don´t think that one´s behaving llike an "adult" when you´re simply leaving instead of discussing a problem...

[snowcat]

I don't think so either. and I think it is childish to just leave a thread because we don't discuss something. There was an another way to to solve this problem I think.

[tanja]

well, so I´m not the only one thinking that discussing the problem would solve it...in my opinion leaving instead of talking is more than childish

[ginger newts]

The problem is that what could have been a polite discussion about celebrity and fandom became a heated argument in which personal insults were traded. That kind of discussion, I feel and I believe many other members feel, should be done privately through the PM system on the board rather than publically. The argument was beginning to upset members who were not personally involved in it and was taking away from their enjoyment of the board as a place to unwind.

Speaking as a moderator, I regret my non-involvement and I believe that April was fully within her rights to close a thread that was no longer adding anything to the board environment or our understanding of the world of AD/MM fan fiction. In fact, it was detracting from that environment and had little or nothing to do with the purposes for which the board was created. I don't believe it was a matter of censorship, but rather a case of a moderator choosing to protect the atmosphere of her forum by requesting that a personal argument be made private. It seems to me that was a mature reaction. If two people were having a loud argument in a restaurant, would the management not ask them to leave and if necessary forcibly remove them? I believe it would happen that way. This was no different.

Storming out does indeed appear childish. What's even more childish is posting a message containing final insults on your way out in an attempt to have the last word. I guess some people are never happy unless they're making someone else unhappy.

I personally want this board to remain a friendly and relaxing environment. Most of us are adults and I think we can all appreciate the fact that personal matters should be settled privately and not in a public shouting match. I do hope that recent events haven't tainted the board in the eyes of our newer members and that they'll stick around to have some fun.

[punurple]

Although it may seem that avoiding the issue instead of discussing it seems "childish" it sometimes is the best thing to do. My dad posts on a forum for a game he plays and is good friends with the guy who owns the server. Well, this mod had to kick a guy out for breaking the rules. A week later the mod got a package in the mail with pictures of his family and a threatening letter from the guy he kicked, who happened to live on a different continent.

The whole situation could have been avoided if the mod had ignored the man's rude comments after he had been kicked, but either way the situation was not going well.

I'm not saying those involved are going to start sending threatening letters, but I am saying that sometimes it is best to ignore it. It is unfortunate that several members felt the need to leave because of an argument on a forum, the will be missed, but obviously there is a bigger reason for it. A discussion may have helped, but it is entirely possible that it could just make matters worse.

punurple

[Taylor]

Moderators and the owners of the board have the final say. It was their decision to create this board, and they have the right to remove posts as well.

It takes two (or three) to continue a disagreement. If at any time you all have a problem with something, its really best to go to the moderator and run it past them. In the same light, the moderator has the same responsibility NOT to take sides and to find out what is going on in private before going public. If a thread truly gets out of hand, then, they have the right to stop things right away, and remove it with out explanation.

and no, its not being childish to leave a board if it is causing too much stress in your life. (though a PM to the moderator may have been better to explain why they felt the need to go, and perhaps the moderators would be able to correct the problems in the future.

I would suggest that future conversations about this matter, and other concerns be done through PM as this thread, again, is not contributing to the ADMM fiction.

I would also suggest that the moderators have a heart to heart discussion with the members involved in the matter to see that their actions do not cause distress to others, to determine if there is a pattern of others having difficulty with these members, decide accordingly what is to be the followup actions and lets just get on with why we are here.

To ship Albusofthesexiebuns and Minervaoftheloveofhislife...

Taylor Grey