The [s]Worst[/s] Best Valentine's Day Ever

[ginger newts]

My take on Hogwarts Duo's fab V-Day challenge. Hope to see many more!

The Worst Best Valentine's Day Ever

Albus and Minerva were rudely awoken one cold February morning by a very impatient owl taping at the window. Once Albus had permitted the creature entrance to their rooms, after a good deal of grumbling on his part and some sharply spoken words from Minerva, he realized the cause of its hurry. No sooner had the owl dropped the scarlet envelope on the bed and beat a hasty retreat out the window did the letter explode of its own accord. The very loud voice of Albus’ younger brother Aberforth filled their bedroom, wishing them a happy St. Valentine’s Day and making some very lewd suggestions about how to celebrate.

Minerva had previously pulled the covers up over her head, but as the Howler destroyed itself she pushed them away and glared at her husband. “Why would he do such a thing?” she asked.

“How should I know how he thinks,” answered an equally annoyed and slightly sheepish Albus.

“He’s YOUR brother,” she accused.

“Well I can’t help that!” he exclaimed.

Minerva opened her mouth to respond, but before she had a chance to speak Albus leaned over and kissed her soundly.

“It’s Valentine’s Day, love. I don’t want to spend it fighting with you,” he said gently.

“I don’t want to fight either,” she answered with a soft smile. “I love you.”

“I love you too,”Albus whispered, leaning in to kiss her again.

Unfortunately, the holiday had fallen on a Tuesday this year and not only would they be unable to go out, they also had to teach classes, meet with other professors, and generally run the school. Albus loved being the headmaster of Hogwarts, but sometimes he hated the fact that his duties kept him from really treating his lovely wife to the things he thought she deserved. Minerva was nearly as busy and never seemed to mind, but Albus wished that he could whisk her away to a romantic city for Valentine’s Day. Since they had to spend the day like any other day, they were forced to get up and get dressed after a few more minutes of loving kisses.

While Albus was in the bathroom, Minerva slipped a small bag into the pocket of his robes, hoping he wouldn’t find it until later in the day – after he got to his office. She had braved a Muggle candy shop a couple of weeks ago to purchase a bag of his favorite sweets. Then, she had transfigured the circular lemon drops into hearts and attached a short note reminding him that he was the keeper of her heart. Minerva knew he would appreciate the gesture as much as the treat.

As they walked to breakfast in the Great Hall a little while later, Albus’ thoughts turned to the gift he had purchased for Minerva. He had bought a very racy lingerie set: a red lacy camisole with matching panties. He couldn’t wait to see it on her and thought she would enjoy it as well. Minerva always seemed to enjoy wearing things to entice him and even though she needed no help to make herself desirable to him, Albus couldn’t stop himself from buying her sexy things to wear on occasion. The only problem was that the store didn’t have any in her size and he’d had to order the items; they hadn’t arrived yet. He hoped they would before the day was out so they could enjoy the gift later that night.

“Good morning, Headmaster, Minerva,” the greeting was repeated by several of their colleagues as the couple took their seats at the long head table.

“Good morning,” they both answered pleasantly.

Albus and Minerva settled into conversations with the staff members sitting near them and began to eat breakfast, paying no attention to the mail delivery owls that began to arrive a few minutes later. Most of the staff ignored the owls because their mail was general taken directly to their offices or private rooms. This morning, however, one owl was winging its way toward the head table with a small black box clutched in its talons. Many heads turned to watch the progress of the unusual package, which the owl lost its grip on and dropped directly in front of the deputy headmistress.

The small black box hit the table and burst open, spilling its contents. A pair of very small red lacy knickers fell into Minerva’s lap and a matching camisole draped itself across Albus’ goblet of pumpkin juice. There were several moments of stunned silence in the Great Hall, making everyone uncomfortable, before the laughter and cheering broke out.

“How could you?!” Minerva hissed under her breath before balling up the knickers and throwing them in the headmaster’s face and storming out through the side door.

He knew better than to follow her immediately, but Albus was very upset. He gathered up the lingerie, placed it back in the box, and banished it to their rooms, hoping he could explain what had happened and Minerva would still wear the items later. Walking out of the Great Hall a few minutes later, Albus was distracted and hit his head painfully on one of the bow and arrow sets that had been hung in decoration. He ripped the decoration down as he passed and mumbled something about never using them again as he continued to his office.

The rude Howler from Aberforth seemed to have set the tone for a day that just got worse and worse for Albus and Minerva. Minerva was so embarrassed by the events at breakfast that she didn’t know how she was going to face her students. She had to, however, and so she strengthened her resolve and decided to act as though nothing had happened. Instead of being embarrassed and blushing all day, Minerva decided to blame Albus and be angry with him for making her a spectacle.

The only problem with that was that as the day wore on she began to feel bad for being angry with Albus on a holiday designed to celebrate love. It wasn’t really his fault, she reasoned, and he had probably been embarrassed as well. Storming out had been a childish response and had probably sent the message to all her students that the lingerie had been intended for her. Why hadn’t she acted like it was a mistake, she chided herself.

Meanwhile, Albus had reached his office and discovered the gift Minerva hd left in his pocket. He smiled when he saw the heart shaped lemon drops and his eyes grew moist reading her short but touching note. She had even included a sentence to tease him about their celebration to come that night. With a sigh, he checked his watch and noted that she still had two hours of classes before lunch. Albus decided to wait outside her classroom in the last few minutes. Hopefully they could talk before going to lunch and everything would be alright between them.

At ten minutes to twelve, Albus planted himself outside the door to Minerva’s classroom and waited for her to dismiss her students. A few minutes later he was drawn from his thoughts when the door opened and students began pouring out. Many of them greeted him and Albus smiled and nodded in return. He entered the classroom and closed the door, causing Minerva to look up from the stack of parchment she was holding.

“Hi,” he said, walking toward her.

“I’m sorry I stormed out at breakfast,” she said before he had a chance to say anything further. “I know that it wasn’t your fault, I was just so embarrassed.”

“I’m sorry it happened that way,” Albus answered as he wrapped his arms around her in a comforting manner. “The store was out of your size and I had to order, but I never imagined it would come with the general mail delivery.”

He kissed the top of Minerva’s head and rubbed her back as she buried her face in the front of his robes, remembering the cheers and laughter from a few hours ago.

“You know, running out like that just acknowledged that the underwear was for you,”Albus reminded her with a chuckle. “Hey, wait,” he exclaimed. “How did you know it was for you and not a random accident?”

Minerva pulled back and gave him an “are you serious” look. “Albus Dumbledore. Your. Name. Was. On. The. Box,” she said slowly.

He blushed and looked chagrined. “Of course it was,” he answered. “Well, do you approve of my choice?”

She smiled and tapped the side of his long crooked nose, “The answer to that, my dear Headmaster, you will get later tonight in a more appropriate location.”

Albus grinned and his eyes twinkled madly as he leaned in to kiss her tenderly. Just as he was about to deepen the kiss, his phoenix Fawkes burst into the office in a brilliant flash of flame. The couple jumped apart in shock and then groaned when they recognized their intruder. Fawkes circled overhead and crooned a series of notes as Albus and Minerva just stared at him.

[ginger newts]

“Albus, what is he doing?” Minerva asked.

Albus sighed, “He just had a burning day, remember? He always acts a bit strange after that, though I’ll admit this is new.”

“Does he want something?” she practically whispered, as though the suggestion might offend the large bird.

“I don’t know,” Albus shrugged and held out his arm.

Fawkes settled on Albus’ arm and nudged his cheek with the top of his head. Then, he tucked his head under his wing as though to sleep. Minerva watched the interaction with one eyebrow raised. She had been married to Albus for quite some time and was very familiar with the eccentricities of both him and his bird, but this was new. Albus looked at her helplessly and prodded Fawkes with one long finger.

“If you’re going to sleep, go back to the office,” he said sternly.

Fawkes cooed a rude note and left in a burst of flames. Albus shook his head and offered Minerva his arm to walk to lunch.

“Albus,” she said, “it’s Valentine’s Day and we’ve hardly had any time to ourselves. Let’s skip lunch and stay here.”

He smiled widely and sat down behind her desk, opening his arms to her. Minerva moved easily onto his lap and snuggled into his embrace. They spent the rest of the all too short lunch hour cuddling and sharing loving kisses and tender caresses. It was very difficult for both of them to part when the time came. Minerva pulled a mirror out of a desk drawer and they checked that their appearances were presentable before she walked Albus to the door, where her next class was waiting.

“Thank you for taking your lunch hour to go over those things with me, Professor,” Albus said on his way out.

“You’re quite welcome, Headmaster,” she answered with a smile. “Come in, class.”

Within the hour, Minerva’s smile was gone and she sincerely regretted not cancelling all of her classes for the day in order to spend the time with Albus. She had been teaching her third years to transfigure tortoises into teapots and one young boy had turned his table mate into a tortoise instead. Unfortunately, it was only a partial transfiguration and the girl had retained her own head on a tortoise’s body. Still having a human head and the ability to speak, she began screaming in fright before yelling at her friend. It took Minerva ten minutes to calm her down enough to fix the error.

“If you don’t calm down and sit still,” she told the panicky child sternly, “I’ll have to send you to St. Mungo’s for a Mandrake draught. Would you like that?”

“No!” the girl wailed, tears streaming down her face.

Minerva set her to rights again and gave the class a lecture on being more careful before dismissing them twenty minutes early with the assignment of two feet of parchment on why caution in the classroom would reduce accident and injury. She sat down heavily behind her desk after they left and fished a headache relief potion out of a drawer. Will this day ever end? She wondered.

The boy who had caused the accident felt so bad about it, he had seen the stress on Minerva’s face, that he wanted to do something to make it up to her. When he got back to the Hufflepuff common room later, he began asking for suggestions. As a result, he found several of his house mates who had made similar mistakes during Transfiguration class and they all began to form a plan to do something nice for their professor later in the day.

When her seemingly endless day of teaching was finally over, Minerva sought Albus out in his office. She found him dictating a letter to an auto-quill and sharing his heart shaped candies with a still moody Fawkes. He looked up and smiled at her and she waited for him to finish with his letter before speaking.

“Sincerely, Albus Dumbledore.” He stopped the charmed quill and then greeted his wife, “Hello, my dear. How was the rest of your day?”

“Stressful,” she answered crisply, “but I don’t wish to discuss it. I would much rather spend a few minutes relaxing with my husband before dinner.”

“Your husband is a very lucky man, then,” he said with a smile. “Shall I see if I can find him for you?”

“Mmm, tell him his wife is in desperate need of some affection,” she answered as she stepped into his arms.

Albus chuckled and held her tightly for a few moments before beginning to nuzzle her neck. Minerva sighed happily and relaxed against him, tilting her head to the side to give him better access to her neck. After a moment she became aware that they were being watched quite closely by the portraits of the previous headmasters and mistresses. Before she could comment that this made her nervous, Albus leaned back and captured her lips in a passionate kiss that left her breathless. He gave her almost no time to catch her breath before initiating another kiss. She moaned into his mouth and pressed the full length of her body against his, feeling his growing arousal.

There was a sudden outburst from the portraits. “Not again, Dumbledore!; Honestly, must you always do this here?; No one wants to see that!” the cacophony of voices exclaimed.

Albus and Minerva broke apart reluctantly and Minerva ducked her head, leaning her forehead against his chest.

“Would you rather I take it to my bedroom?” Albus asked with a chuckle.

“Yes!” several of the portraits answered heartily.

Albus raised his hands in defeat. “Alright, alright, you win. You’ll never be subjected to such a display again,” he promised. “Anyway, it’s time for dinner now. Shall we?” he offered his arm to Minerva.

She took it gratefully, very happy that there was only an hour left until she could hide herself away in her rooms with Albus and forget the rest of this day.

Dinner couldn’t pass quickly enough for the couple, who wanted only to be alone together. When the meal finally ended, they all but ran back to their rooms to begin a romantic night. Albus had been dreaming all day of just the perfect way to spend the night. First, he wanted to take a long hot bubble bath with Minerva, where they could relax and sip a glass of fine wine. Then, he would give her a massage and hopefully she would slip into the lingerie he had purchased. The rest of the evening’s activities would depend on their imagination at the time, but he knew they would be both amazing and fulfilling.

When they reached their rooms, Albus asked Minerva to pour two glasses of their wine while he filled the tub. On their wedding day, a rich uncle had given them an entire case of wine that had been bottled in Minerva’s birth year; it was his custom to do so with every bride in the family. The wine was excellent and quite expensive and they only drank it on their anniversary and Valentine’s Day. As Albus turned off the taps a few minutes later and Minerva entered the bathroom dressed only in her dressing gown and bearing two glasses of wine, they heard a strange noise from outside.

It sounded as though a large group of students were outdoors playing and almost directly beneath their window. Minerva sighed again and put down the glasses she was holding.

“How dare they be out of doors now!” she exclaimed angrily. “Whatever could they be thinking?”

She stormed to the nearest bedroom window, quite prepared to remove fifty points from each student and throw them all into detention for a week. However, as she opened the window, she realized they were singing.

“Albus,” she hissed. “Come here. What do you think this is about?”

He joined her at the window, wrapping his arms around her shoulders where she stood in the shadows. At first, he didn’t recognize the song, but then he realized that the young men had re-written the Muggle song “To Sir, With Love” so that the lyrics were appropriate to be sung to a female teacher by her male students. When they finished the song, an owl flew up to the open window and delivered a note to Minerva.

Dear Professor McGonagall,

Please excuse us for being out after hours, but we wanted to show you our appreciation for what a wonderful teacher you’ve been. We would also each like to apologize for the accidents we’ve caused over the years. You’re the best teacher most of us have ever had and we’re sorry for any undue stress we may have caused.

We’ve attached the lyrics to the song you just heard. Matthew re-wrote them himself.

Thank you for everything!

There were about twenty names beneath that, all students from Hufflepuff. Minerva had tears in her eyes as she leaned her head out the window.

“Thank you all so very much,” she called down to the boys. “Twenty points to Hufflepuff, one for each of you. Now get back to your common room before I have to remove them again!”

The boys all laughed and waved good-bye as they rounded the corner.

Albus turned her around and wiped her tears away with his thumbs, smiling at her. “That may be the nicest thing I’ve ever seen a group of students do for a professor,” he said. “Are you feeling better now?”

“Much,” she answered with a smile.

“Good,” he said. “Now let’s see if we can finally have the romantic evening I’ve been dreaming of all day.”

“That sounds wonderful,” she agreed, leading the way into the bathroom and dropping her dressing gown along the way.

The End

A/N: I know it's a bit early, but I promised some people I'd post it today.

[griseldalafey]

I cringed when Albus' gift was delivered during breakfast. That must have been *so* embarrasing.

lol ;D

I loved the story!

[Karlynne]

I loved the idea of the Hufflepuff boys serenading Minerva. I wanted to die for her when she received Albus' gift at the table. Karlie

[Kassandra]

I guess Minerva's day didn't start out too well but I'm glad it ended very well for her. Kassie

[Isabelle]

This was a lovely response. Poor Minerva though I am glad her day turned out all right!

Liz

[QuillofMinerva]

Teehee, thats a great challenge response. I know aAng and Lisa from hogwarts duo will be over the moon.

Teehee...I laughed and cringed when Minervas present arrived at the table the way it did.

Aww having the Hufflepuff boys serenading Minerva was a really nice touch to the story.

Yayeeee for valentines fics

[Kamdra]

You did a very good job with the challenge. I liked the embarrassing scene in the great hall. Kammie

[Hogwarts Duo]

WOMAN...YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC!!! This story had us giggling from the howler to the serendade! We could sense the frustration from both Albus and Minerva and the ending was soooo sweet. MEGA-BROWINE POINTS for such a brilliant blending of the ingredients! THANK YOU!!!

[angeldust]

wow yay!!! fantastic i love it!!!!! ;D and so well written

[TabbyMin]

Love it! -tabbymin

[Nerweniel]

Aaaaaaaaw ;D... poor Minerva for that underwear-incident, I'd SLAP Albus... but thank god for those sweet hufflepuffs ;D! Great Valentine's Day story, whee, lovely challenge response!

Love,

Baby Sis

[Karmin]

This really did start out as a horrible day but I'm glad it got much better. I loved the presentation of Albus' gift and the boys singing to her.

[Sensiblyquirky]

Oh I loved this, pal. Excellent response, as if there was ever any doubt.

Christy

[dme0414]

yes excellent. well done

[Mandy McGonagall-Dumbledore]

Well done!!!