Post by KristaMarie on Sept 29, 2007 20:32:38 GMT -5
Title: Hands Clean
Rating: umm… K+ (?)
Summary: a song fic for mmadcrazyfan, because she asked so nicely. I hope you like it! I’m not sure if I love it, but if you hate it, I’ll fix it lol! ~~~ They thought they could, but they just couldn’t wash their hands clean of each other…
Disclaimer: Not mine, sadly. The song is Alanis Morissette’s “Hands Clean”.
If it weren't for your maturity none of this would have happened
If you weren't so wise beyond your years I would've been able to control myself
If it weren't for my attention you wouldn't have been successful and
If it weren't for me you would never have amounted to very much
It shouldn’t have happened—but I can’t regret it. I know I could very easily lose my job, but still, I can’t regret it. She is unlike any student I ever taught—passionate, determined, willing…yes, very willing… and far beyond her years. That’s what made this so easy. I don’t look at it as an affair with a student, because as I said, she is like no other student to ever pass through my classroom door. No, Minerva McGonagall is no ordinary student—she is an extraordinary young woman. No, I most certainly don’t regret it…
Ooh this could be messy
But you don't seem to mind
Ooh don't go telling everybody
And overlook this supposed crime
She’s graduating… we’ll be free to love one another freely. Yes, that is right, I have fallen in love with her. How could I not? She’s beautiful, intelligent, caring, and downright scary when she wants to be. But most of all, she loves me. Well, did love me. I warned her that our relationship will not be looked upon favorably. She didn’t care—all that mattered to her was that we could be together. And that would be fine if I hadn’t told her that she couldn’t tell anyone about us. She hates being referred to as an old maid, and my heart brakes when I hear some of the comments other students make. Her deepest desire was to shout her love for me from the rooftops, and I’m denying her. I’m denying my beautiful Tabby the one thing she wants more than anything else in this world right now. And that is why she is not here in my chambers with me; that’s why she is packing to go home tomorrow.
We'll fast forward to a few years later
And no one knows except the both of us
And I have honored your request for silence
And you've washed your hands clean of this
I can’t believe I’ returning to this place. When I left here I never wanted to see this castle or… him again. But yet, 12 years later, here I am after receiving an owl from Albus, asking me to fill his recently vacated Transfiguration position. It broke my heart to leave him all those years ago, but I couldn’t stay. Not when he feared what would be said. I had thought that wouldn’t matter to him—he’d say ‘the public be damned’, but I suppose that was an innocent girl’s fairytale… a fairytale that didn’t come true. And I have honored his request for silence… and he’s washed his hands clean…
You're essentially an employee and I like you having to depend on me
You're kind of my protégée and one day you'll say you learned all you know from me
I know you depend on me like a young thing would to a guardian
I know you sexualize me like a young thing would and I think I like it
I can’t deny that I’m happy she came back—I’m ecstatic. But I fear I may be ecstatic for the wrong reasons. She works under me now, and while I would never throw that in her face, a part of me can’t help but be glad that she has to depend on me a little. I have missed her these many years, and I’m selfish enough to think she missed me too. However, she is not the same girl—woman—she was then. She seems more reserved, colder even. The light that used to sparkle in her eyes is a mere flicker now. I don’t want to think that it’s my fault, but I know deep in my heart that it is.
Ooh this could get messy
But you don't seem to mind
Ooh don't go telling everybody
And overlook this supposed crime
We'll fast forward to a few years later
And no one knows except the both of us
And I have honored your request for silence
And you've washed your hands clean of this
Why is it that a woman always falls for the one she can never completely have? Six months after I returned, we finally got around to talking to one another. We slowly began to rebuild our friendship, but the wonderful memories of our time together my seventh year came flooding back. Within a few weeks, we were together again, just like before. It’s been wonderful, but here I am two years later, wondering if he’s going to hurt me again. We never talk about the night I decided to leave, and sometimes I wonder if that is a good thing or not. I want nothing more than to spend my life with him—I no longer care of everyone knows or not. I just don’t know if I could handle it if he doesn’t want to spend his life with me. Perhaps I should end things before I fall even deeper in love with him… if that’s even possible…
what part of our history's reinvented and under rug swept?
what part of your memory is selective and tends to forget?
what with this distance it seems so obvious?
She tried to end it tonight, just as she had done in her seventh year—but for very different reasons. Back then she was an emotionally damaged individual, wanting nothing more than to prove to the world that someone did indeed love her, and the she herself was capable of loving another. Tonight, she was terrified of being hurt again. This time, I intended on stopping her. I wasn’t about to let her go again. I love her, more than I ever loved anyone in my entire life. I asked her to not forget our past, but to push that painful night to the back of her brilliant mind. Yes, we had made mistakes, but they were in the past. I asked her to remember our time together—how happy we both were. I asked her if she forgot how much she meant to me, and I to her.
She didn’t forget. I smiled.
I told her that distancing herself from me would only make our lives that much harder. I knew she didn’t want to go, and I most certainly didn’t want her to go. I told her that it wouldn’t always be easy, that our relationship would have to remain private. But just because things got hard, or because we couldn’t tell anyone, that didn’t mean I didn’t love her. I wanted nothing more than to stand on the Astronomy tower that I, Albus Dumbledore, loved Minerva McGonagall more than all the stars in the sky.
She knew. And for the first time that night, she smiled too.
Just make sure you don't tell on me especially to members of your family
We best keep this to ourselves and not tell any members of our inner posse
I wish I could tell the world cuz you're such a pretty thing when you're done up properly
I might want to marry you one day if you watch that weight and keep your firm body
Ooh this could be messy and
Ooh I don't seem to mind
Ooh don't go telling everybody
And overlook this supposed crime
This won’t be easy. But I love him and that’s all that matters; I realize that now.
This will be difficult, but it always was going to be. And I have no intention of losing her now. I love her with every fiber of my being.
We thought we could wash our hands clean of this once upon a time. But we can’t. And we don’t ever want to.
FIN
Rating: umm… K+ (?)
Summary: a song fic for mmadcrazyfan, because she asked so nicely. I hope you like it! I’m not sure if I love it, but if you hate it, I’ll fix it lol! ~~~ They thought they could, but they just couldn’t wash their hands clean of each other…
Disclaimer: Not mine, sadly. The song is Alanis Morissette’s “Hands Clean”.
If it weren't for your maturity none of this would have happened
If you weren't so wise beyond your years I would've been able to control myself
If it weren't for my attention you wouldn't have been successful and
If it weren't for me you would never have amounted to very much
It shouldn’t have happened—but I can’t regret it. I know I could very easily lose my job, but still, I can’t regret it. She is unlike any student I ever taught—passionate, determined, willing…yes, very willing… and far beyond her years. That’s what made this so easy. I don’t look at it as an affair with a student, because as I said, she is like no other student to ever pass through my classroom door. No, Minerva McGonagall is no ordinary student—she is an extraordinary young woman. No, I most certainly don’t regret it…
Ooh this could be messy
But you don't seem to mind
Ooh don't go telling everybody
And overlook this supposed crime
She’s graduating… we’ll be free to love one another freely. Yes, that is right, I have fallen in love with her. How could I not? She’s beautiful, intelligent, caring, and downright scary when she wants to be. But most of all, she loves me. Well, did love me. I warned her that our relationship will not be looked upon favorably. She didn’t care—all that mattered to her was that we could be together. And that would be fine if I hadn’t told her that she couldn’t tell anyone about us. She hates being referred to as an old maid, and my heart brakes when I hear some of the comments other students make. Her deepest desire was to shout her love for me from the rooftops, and I’m denying her. I’m denying my beautiful Tabby the one thing she wants more than anything else in this world right now. And that is why she is not here in my chambers with me; that’s why she is packing to go home tomorrow.
We'll fast forward to a few years later
And no one knows except the both of us
And I have honored your request for silence
And you've washed your hands clean of this
I can’t believe I’ returning to this place. When I left here I never wanted to see this castle or… him again. But yet, 12 years later, here I am after receiving an owl from Albus, asking me to fill his recently vacated Transfiguration position. It broke my heart to leave him all those years ago, but I couldn’t stay. Not when he feared what would be said. I had thought that wouldn’t matter to him—he’d say ‘the public be damned’, but I suppose that was an innocent girl’s fairytale… a fairytale that didn’t come true. And I have honored his request for silence… and he’s washed his hands clean…
You're essentially an employee and I like you having to depend on me
You're kind of my protégée and one day you'll say you learned all you know from me
I know you depend on me like a young thing would to a guardian
I know you sexualize me like a young thing would and I think I like it
I can’t deny that I’m happy she came back—I’m ecstatic. But I fear I may be ecstatic for the wrong reasons. She works under me now, and while I would never throw that in her face, a part of me can’t help but be glad that she has to depend on me a little. I have missed her these many years, and I’m selfish enough to think she missed me too. However, she is not the same girl—woman—she was then. She seems more reserved, colder even. The light that used to sparkle in her eyes is a mere flicker now. I don’t want to think that it’s my fault, but I know deep in my heart that it is.
Ooh this could get messy
But you don't seem to mind
Ooh don't go telling everybody
And overlook this supposed crime
We'll fast forward to a few years later
And no one knows except the both of us
And I have honored your request for silence
And you've washed your hands clean of this
Why is it that a woman always falls for the one she can never completely have? Six months after I returned, we finally got around to talking to one another. We slowly began to rebuild our friendship, but the wonderful memories of our time together my seventh year came flooding back. Within a few weeks, we were together again, just like before. It’s been wonderful, but here I am two years later, wondering if he’s going to hurt me again. We never talk about the night I decided to leave, and sometimes I wonder if that is a good thing or not. I want nothing more than to spend my life with him—I no longer care of everyone knows or not. I just don’t know if I could handle it if he doesn’t want to spend his life with me. Perhaps I should end things before I fall even deeper in love with him… if that’s even possible…
what part of our history's reinvented and under rug swept?
what part of your memory is selective and tends to forget?
what with this distance it seems so obvious?
She tried to end it tonight, just as she had done in her seventh year—but for very different reasons. Back then she was an emotionally damaged individual, wanting nothing more than to prove to the world that someone did indeed love her, and the she herself was capable of loving another. Tonight, she was terrified of being hurt again. This time, I intended on stopping her. I wasn’t about to let her go again. I love her, more than I ever loved anyone in my entire life. I asked her to not forget our past, but to push that painful night to the back of her brilliant mind. Yes, we had made mistakes, but they were in the past. I asked her to remember our time together—how happy we both were. I asked her if she forgot how much she meant to me, and I to her.
She didn’t forget. I smiled.
I told her that distancing herself from me would only make our lives that much harder. I knew she didn’t want to go, and I most certainly didn’t want her to go. I told her that it wouldn’t always be easy, that our relationship would have to remain private. But just because things got hard, or because we couldn’t tell anyone, that didn’t mean I didn’t love her. I wanted nothing more than to stand on the Astronomy tower that I, Albus Dumbledore, loved Minerva McGonagall more than all the stars in the sky.
She knew. And for the first time that night, she smiled too.
Just make sure you don't tell on me especially to members of your family
We best keep this to ourselves and not tell any members of our inner posse
I wish I could tell the world cuz you're such a pretty thing when you're done up properly
I might want to marry you one day if you watch that weight and keep your firm body
Ooh this could be messy and
Ooh I don't seem to mind
Ooh don't go telling everybody
And overlook this supposed crime
This won’t be easy. But I love him and that’s all that matters; I realize that now.
This will be difficult, but it always was going to be. And I have no intention of losing her now. I love her with every fiber of my being.
We thought we could wash our hands clean of this once upon a time. But we can’t. And we don’t ever want to.
FIN
