Post by Lamenting Quill on Nov 2, 2006 19:36:03 GMT -5
This fic is rated G, safe for everyone 
Summary: HBP SPOILERS! MMAD: When Minerva appears to be in denial over the death of her best friend, Rolanda Hooch decides to confront her on the matter, and finds out more than she ever dreamed about the woman she thought she knew.
Disclaimer: Not mine, J.K Rowling’s, I’m just borrowing them
Note: Special thanks to my beta, Sev1970! She's amazing
“She’s too indifferent.”
“Of course she’s indifferent, Rolanda, it is Minerva we are talking about!”
Rolanda Hooch sighed, sitting down next to Poppy in the empty Hospital Wing. “I know that Minerva handles these things differently, Poppy, but you can’t tell me this is not unusual, even for her. She’s more distant than usual, she’s more irritable, and she’s become more frigid. I know she and Albus were close; everyone knows they’ve been the best of friends for longer than some of the staff members here have been alive, yet she doesn’t seem to be grieving at all. I’m worried that she hasn’t accepted his death, and I think she needs to realise he isn’t coming back. I just don’t know what is going on with her. Do you know that I heard one of the house-elves saying the other day that she covered Albus’s portrait in her new office with a black sheet?”
Poppy looked at her friend in puzzlement. “She covered his portrait? Why would she do that?”
Rolanda shrugged. “Your guess is as good as mine. She’s never reacted in such a manner before. Even when her parents were killed, she never did anything such as cover their photographs. She’s been acting strange lately, that’s all I am saying.” She wiped a hand over her face thoughtfully. “It’s funny, though; I’ve known Minerva since before we even started Hogwarts, yet I still don’t know her; you know what I mean?”
Poppy snorted. “I don’t think anyone truly knows Minerva, Rolanda. She won’t let anyone get close enough to her for them to find out more than she thinks they ought to know.”
“Well, I’m not going to just sit by and watch her lose herself completely in her work as she’s been doing, and I’m not going to let her skirt around a conversation about Albus’s death as she’s been doing, either; I’m going up to her office to have a talk with her.”
Poppy nodded. “I think that’s a good idea. You’ve got the best chance of getting through to her; you’re closer to her than anyone else. If you need me, I’ll be here, and let me know how it goes when you’re finished. We’ve all been worried.”
Rolanda nodded. “I will. See you in a bit,” she said, as she exited the Hospital Wing for the Headmistress’s office.
Upon reaching the gargoyle, she uttered the password and soon found herself standing outside the large door. Taking a deep breath, steeling her nerves, she raised her hand and knocked loudly.
“Enter.”
Opening the door, she found Minerva seated at the large desk, head bent over a stack of parchment and brows furrowed in concentration. She immediately took notice of the black sheet that covered the fallen Headmaster’s portrait. “Hello, Minerva. I thought perhaps you might have time for a little chat. It’s been a while.” Minerva looked up from her stack of papers and nodded, though Rolanda noticed she didn’t smile.
“As long as it is a quick one, Rolanda; I fear I still have a lot of paperwork to get finished before September,” Minerva said, motioning for Rolanda to take the seat opposite her, which she did. “Would you like some tea?”
Rolanda shook her head. “No, thank you. So apart from being swamped with all this paperwork, how have you been, Minerva? None of the staff have seen much of you lately.” She noticed her friend’s lips had tightened slightly at this question.
“I’m fine; I’ve just been busy. The Governors have been breathing down my neck lately over the fact that I have yet to find a replacement for the Defence Against the Dark Arts position. They’re threatening to appoint one for me if I don’t find one soon, and I shudder at the thought. Merlin knows the last thing we need right now is another Dolores Umbridge.”
Rolanda nodded, deciding to throw Albus’s name into the conversation to see what would happen. “Definitely not; poor Albus would turn over in his grave at the very thought of that woman coming back inside this school.” She noticed that while Minerva’s eyes were still trained on the parchment before her, they were unmoving, and the fingers gripping her stationary quill were turning white.
Rolanda took a deep breath, deciding to bite the curse, so to speak, and just come out and ask the question she had come to get the answer to. “Minerva, how are you coping? With Albus’s death I mean. The staff is worried about you; you’ve not been yourself lately. We know you and Albus were close friends, and--” she broke off suddenly as Minerva abruptly jumped to her feet, looking at the clock.
“I’m sorry, Rolanda, but it is later than I thought. If you’ll excuse me, I need to go--”
“No,” Rolanda said, standing to meet her friend’s fiery gaze. “I’m not leaving this time, Minerva. I’ve let you skirt around this issue long enough. I’ve known you longer than anyone here, and while I’ve never understood you, or the way you handle things such as this, I can see that you are not handling this at all. He was your best friend; you worked closely together for many years, so it’s only natural that you miss him.”
“I don’t need to hear this, Rolanda--” Minerva started to snap, before Rolanda interrupted her again.
“I think that you do. Albus is gone, Minerva; I’m not sure that you’ve realised that yet. You need to accept it, and grieve so you can begin to heal. He’s not coming back; not this time,” Rolanda finished softly. She could feel the anger radiating off of Minerva, and while it wasn’t the reaction she had been expecting, she hoped it would help the woman get where she needed to be emotionally.
“Don’t talk to me about things you don’t understand,” Minerva snapped. “If this is all you’ve come to discuss with me, Rolanda, I think you know where the door is.”
“I’m not leaving, Minerva. Not until I’m sure you understand. You are in denial; it is hard to lose your dearest friend, I know, but Minerva, covering his portrait on the wall with a black sheet is not going to hide the fact that he is dead.”
“Don’t you think I bloody well know that?” Minerva suddenly screamed, angry tears forming in her eyes, as she slammed her fist against the desk causing Rolanda to jump in surprise. “I didn’t cover that portrait because I am in denial, Rolanda; far from it in fact! I covered it because I couldn’t bear coming in here everyday and seeing those twinkling eyes watching me; because I couldn’t bear seeing him everyday and knowing that I couldn’t reach out and touch him. You can talk until you’re blue in the face about how well you know me, and how you know what I am going through, but you know nothing, Roland, nothing!”
Rolanda frowned sadly as she stared into Minerva’s teary eyes. “Then please, Minerva, enlighten me.”
Minerva shook her head, looking everywhere but at Rolanda. “Please, just leave it, and let me be alone. I don’t wish to talk about this.”
Rolanda felt her patience wearing thin. “You never wish to talk about it, Minerva! Albus has been gone for a month now, and I haven’t seen you cry over him once apart from the few tears at the funeral!”
“That’s right,” Minerva bit out through clenched teeth, “you haven’t seen me. You haven’t seen me the nights that I have laid awake at night crying into my pillow. You haven’t seen me when I’m up here in this office by myself and I can’t get my work done for having to cast drying charms on my parchments. You haven’t seen me in the mornings when it is all I can do to get out of bed to face another day, that I have to cast concealment charms on myself to hide my appearance so everyone won’t know that I haven’t been sleeping, haven’t been eating. So don’t you dare come up here and tell me that I have been in denial and that I haven’t been grieving, because believe me, Rolanda, I’ve been grieving more than any of you have,” Minerva finished, breathing hard, tears starting to slide down her cheeks only to be brushed away angrily by her shaking hands.
Rolanda was slightly shocked at what her friend had said, but could only focus on one thing. “Take them off.”
“Excuse me?”
“The concealment charms, take them off. Please.” She watched Minerva’s back stiffen in challenge and then watched her sag slightly against her desk in defeat. As she waved her wand, Rolanda couldn’t suppress the gasp that escaped her lips as the charms disappeared.
Minerva’s robes were hanging much looser than normal around her frame. Her eyes were red and swollen, and her face was so pale it looked chalky. Rolanda felt her heart clench; here she had been accusing Minerva of not grieving when the woman had quite obviously been grieving herself to death. “Why didn’t you say anything, Minerva?” she asked softly. “Why didn’t you let me know this sooner? I could have helped you--”
“You can do nothing for me, Rolanda, nor can anyone else. I trust that you will keep this to yourself; I needn’t anyone thinking I am an incapable Headmistress.”
“Minerva, no one is going to think any less of you because you are grieving over the loss of your best friend. We’re all grieving.” Rolanda watched as the anger returned to her friends eyes, and wondered what she had said wrong.
“You know nothing of grief, Rolanda. You all act as though life should just go on, that everything is okay. He’s gone, we miss him, but let’s move on! Well, I can’t just move on, Rolanda! I don’t know what you were expecting to accomplish by coming up here today, but I bloody well hope that you have gotten what you came for. You can go back and tell the others that the indifferent and heartless headmistress is not as cold as they all thought.”
“No one thinks you are heartless, Minerva. We’ve all been worried. I miss Albus too, but--”
“Stop it!” Minerva screeched, “Just stop it!”
Rolanda started, caught off guard by Minerva’s sudden outburst. Staring into her friends wide and tear-filled eyes, she realised that something had snapped. She could see in those green eyes a pain so deep it took her breath away, and a swirling of emotions that were about to be released; emotions that had been pent up for far too long, she was sure.
“Stop comparing what I’m feeling to what you and everyone else are feeling!” Minerva yelled, balling her fists in frustrations. “You are feeling nothing compared to what I am! You could have no idea what I am going through. You have no idea what it has been like since Albus was killed! Everyone talking about how proud I must be to be headmistress; to be the one that Albus chose to take over this school, what an honour it is, and how happy I must be with the increase in pay…. Well I would gladly give every knut I have if it would buy me one more moment with Albus! And the pride I have at being the one Albus chose as his successor is nothing, NOTHING compared to the pride I hold at having been the one he chose as his wife for over fifty years!”
“What?” Rolanda gasped in surprise, as Minerva’s eyes widened and she clapped her hand over her mouth. Minerva was shaking her head, as though in pure disbelief of what she had said, and Rolanda tried to wrap her mind around the words the woman had just spoken. She was speechless. She had never known that Minerva and Albus had been involved, let alone been married for over fifty years. She was feeling an overwhelming sense of guilt, and reached out to touch Minerva’s arm, but the woman jerked away.
“Don’t. Please,” she whispered. “It’s funny,” Minerva snorted bitterly, “we kept our entire relationship a secret. Albus insisted upon it of course, for my safety in the beginning, and then to protect me in the end from criticism, as people would surely start saying I had only gotten my position as Deputy because my husband was the headmaster. All those years, it never bothered me that I could tell no one of our relationship. I was content to be with Albus, and nothing else mattered. I knew that he loved me, so it didn’t matter if anyone else knew it or not; but on that day, when he--” Minerva let out a small sob, “when he died, I wished then that everyone knew. I wanted to scream it from every hill in England, and to the entire world for that matter. But I couldn’t. To say that we were married now would threaten my position as headmistress of this school, and Albus made it clear that if anything ever happened to him I would have to continue our secret, because he said Hogwarts needs me. While that may be true, I need him more than this school ever thought of needing anyone.”
Rolanda watched as the woman let out a heart-wrenching sob and sank to the floor, her shoulders shaking with grief.
“You don’t know what it’s like, Rolanda, to have lost the love of your life and not be able to openly mourn. I lost everything when I lost Albus, yet I have to pretend like I’m fine, like I merely lost a close friend and colleague. I have to endure the offhand comments about how Albus did things, or things that Albus said, and I have to pretend they don’t have a great impact on me, when in reality every little reminder tears me apart once more. I still half expect to find him lying next me when I awake in the middle night, expect to see him come to the Great Hall for meals. He doesn’t come back, Rolanda. He’ll never come back.”
Rolanda felt tears sliding down her own cheeks as she watched Minerva lose herself in her sobs, her face buried in her hands as she screamed a widow’s cry. Kneeling down beside her friend, Rolanda enfolded the shaking woman in her arms, relieved when she didn’t fight, and held her tightly, whispering nonsensical words of comfort. How long they stayed that way Rolanda didn’t know, but she felt her respect grow for the woman weeping in her arms. This woman was the strongest witch Rolanda could ever imagine possible. She couldn’t dream of being able to go through what Minerva had, or dealing with what Minerva was dealing with.
She stroked Minerva’s back soothingly, rocking slightly until the woman’s sobs turned to sniffles and she finally raised up slightly, drying her eyes on the corner of her sleeve.
“You’re a good friend, Rolanda,” Minerva said hoarsely, patting her gently on the arm.
Rolanda shook her head. “Were I a good friend, Minerva, I would have realised that there was something more to your behaviour than my original beliefs. I can’t apologise enough for the things that I said; I had no idea.”
“No one did, and that is how it was supposed to be, and I have to ask you to please not tell anyone what I have divulged to you. No one can know about mine and Albus’s marriage.”
“I won’t say anything; you have my word,” Rolanda said, tucking a lock of fallen hair behind Minerva’s ear. “I admire you, Minerva; your courage and strength. I know wherever Albus is, he’s proud of you. I’m proud of you.”
Minerva gave Rolanda’s hand a little squeeze. “Thank you, Rolanda; that means a lot.”
~*~
As promised, when Rolanda went back to report to Poppy, she told her only that she thought she had gotten through to Minerva, and that they would see an improvement, but she never mentioned the unknown marriage between their two friends and colleagues. Rolanda would never forget that night. She learned more about Minerva in those few moments than she had known in the entirety of their friendship, and she felt privileged to have been the one allowed to see past the indifferent exterior of the Hogwarts Headmistress, and into the heart of the secret widow.
~The End~
Summary: HBP SPOILERS! MMAD: When Minerva appears to be in denial over the death of her best friend, Rolanda Hooch decides to confront her on the matter, and finds out more than she ever dreamed about the woman she thought she knew.
Disclaimer: Not mine, J.K Rowling’s, I’m just borrowing them
Note: Special thanks to my beta, Sev1970! She's amazing
The Secret Widow
A fic by
Lamenting Quill
A fic by
Lamenting Quill
“She’s too indifferent.”
“Of course she’s indifferent, Rolanda, it is Minerva we are talking about!”
Rolanda Hooch sighed, sitting down next to Poppy in the empty Hospital Wing. “I know that Minerva handles these things differently, Poppy, but you can’t tell me this is not unusual, even for her. She’s more distant than usual, she’s more irritable, and she’s become more frigid. I know she and Albus were close; everyone knows they’ve been the best of friends for longer than some of the staff members here have been alive, yet she doesn’t seem to be grieving at all. I’m worried that she hasn’t accepted his death, and I think she needs to realise he isn’t coming back. I just don’t know what is going on with her. Do you know that I heard one of the house-elves saying the other day that she covered Albus’s portrait in her new office with a black sheet?”
Poppy looked at her friend in puzzlement. “She covered his portrait? Why would she do that?”
Rolanda shrugged. “Your guess is as good as mine. She’s never reacted in such a manner before. Even when her parents were killed, she never did anything such as cover their photographs. She’s been acting strange lately, that’s all I am saying.” She wiped a hand over her face thoughtfully. “It’s funny, though; I’ve known Minerva since before we even started Hogwarts, yet I still don’t know her; you know what I mean?”
Poppy snorted. “I don’t think anyone truly knows Minerva, Rolanda. She won’t let anyone get close enough to her for them to find out more than she thinks they ought to know.”
“Well, I’m not going to just sit by and watch her lose herself completely in her work as she’s been doing, and I’m not going to let her skirt around a conversation about Albus’s death as she’s been doing, either; I’m going up to her office to have a talk with her.”
Poppy nodded. “I think that’s a good idea. You’ve got the best chance of getting through to her; you’re closer to her than anyone else. If you need me, I’ll be here, and let me know how it goes when you’re finished. We’ve all been worried.”
Rolanda nodded. “I will. See you in a bit,” she said, as she exited the Hospital Wing for the Headmistress’s office.
Upon reaching the gargoyle, she uttered the password and soon found herself standing outside the large door. Taking a deep breath, steeling her nerves, she raised her hand and knocked loudly.
“Enter.”
Opening the door, she found Minerva seated at the large desk, head bent over a stack of parchment and brows furrowed in concentration. She immediately took notice of the black sheet that covered the fallen Headmaster’s portrait. “Hello, Minerva. I thought perhaps you might have time for a little chat. It’s been a while.” Minerva looked up from her stack of papers and nodded, though Rolanda noticed she didn’t smile.
“As long as it is a quick one, Rolanda; I fear I still have a lot of paperwork to get finished before September,” Minerva said, motioning for Rolanda to take the seat opposite her, which she did. “Would you like some tea?”
Rolanda shook her head. “No, thank you. So apart from being swamped with all this paperwork, how have you been, Minerva? None of the staff have seen much of you lately.” She noticed her friend’s lips had tightened slightly at this question.
“I’m fine; I’ve just been busy. The Governors have been breathing down my neck lately over the fact that I have yet to find a replacement for the Defence Against the Dark Arts position. They’re threatening to appoint one for me if I don’t find one soon, and I shudder at the thought. Merlin knows the last thing we need right now is another Dolores Umbridge.”
Rolanda nodded, deciding to throw Albus’s name into the conversation to see what would happen. “Definitely not; poor Albus would turn over in his grave at the very thought of that woman coming back inside this school.” She noticed that while Minerva’s eyes were still trained on the parchment before her, they were unmoving, and the fingers gripping her stationary quill were turning white.
Rolanda took a deep breath, deciding to bite the curse, so to speak, and just come out and ask the question she had come to get the answer to. “Minerva, how are you coping? With Albus’s death I mean. The staff is worried about you; you’ve not been yourself lately. We know you and Albus were close friends, and--” she broke off suddenly as Minerva abruptly jumped to her feet, looking at the clock.
“I’m sorry, Rolanda, but it is later than I thought. If you’ll excuse me, I need to go--”
“No,” Rolanda said, standing to meet her friend’s fiery gaze. “I’m not leaving this time, Minerva. I’ve let you skirt around this issue long enough. I’ve known you longer than anyone here, and while I’ve never understood you, or the way you handle things such as this, I can see that you are not handling this at all. He was your best friend; you worked closely together for many years, so it’s only natural that you miss him.”
“I don’t need to hear this, Rolanda--” Minerva started to snap, before Rolanda interrupted her again.
“I think that you do. Albus is gone, Minerva; I’m not sure that you’ve realised that yet. You need to accept it, and grieve so you can begin to heal. He’s not coming back; not this time,” Rolanda finished softly. She could feel the anger radiating off of Minerva, and while it wasn’t the reaction she had been expecting, she hoped it would help the woman get where she needed to be emotionally.
“Don’t talk to me about things you don’t understand,” Minerva snapped. “If this is all you’ve come to discuss with me, Rolanda, I think you know where the door is.”
“I’m not leaving, Minerva. Not until I’m sure you understand. You are in denial; it is hard to lose your dearest friend, I know, but Minerva, covering his portrait on the wall with a black sheet is not going to hide the fact that he is dead.”
“Don’t you think I bloody well know that?” Minerva suddenly screamed, angry tears forming in her eyes, as she slammed her fist against the desk causing Rolanda to jump in surprise. “I didn’t cover that portrait because I am in denial, Rolanda; far from it in fact! I covered it because I couldn’t bear coming in here everyday and seeing those twinkling eyes watching me; because I couldn’t bear seeing him everyday and knowing that I couldn’t reach out and touch him. You can talk until you’re blue in the face about how well you know me, and how you know what I am going through, but you know nothing, Roland, nothing!”
Rolanda frowned sadly as she stared into Minerva’s teary eyes. “Then please, Minerva, enlighten me.”
Minerva shook her head, looking everywhere but at Rolanda. “Please, just leave it, and let me be alone. I don’t wish to talk about this.”
Rolanda felt her patience wearing thin. “You never wish to talk about it, Minerva! Albus has been gone for a month now, and I haven’t seen you cry over him once apart from the few tears at the funeral!”
“That’s right,” Minerva bit out through clenched teeth, “you haven’t seen me. You haven’t seen me the nights that I have laid awake at night crying into my pillow. You haven’t seen me when I’m up here in this office by myself and I can’t get my work done for having to cast drying charms on my parchments. You haven’t seen me in the mornings when it is all I can do to get out of bed to face another day, that I have to cast concealment charms on myself to hide my appearance so everyone won’t know that I haven’t been sleeping, haven’t been eating. So don’t you dare come up here and tell me that I have been in denial and that I haven’t been grieving, because believe me, Rolanda, I’ve been grieving more than any of you have,” Minerva finished, breathing hard, tears starting to slide down her cheeks only to be brushed away angrily by her shaking hands.
Rolanda was slightly shocked at what her friend had said, but could only focus on one thing. “Take them off.”
“Excuse me?”
“The concealment charms, take them off. Please.” She watched Minerva’s back stiffen in challenge and then watched her sag slightly against her desk in defeat. As she waved her wand, Rolanda couldn’t suppress the gasp that escaped her lips as the charms disappeared.
Minerva’s robes were hanging much looser than normal around her frame. Her eyes were red and swollen, and her face was so pale it looked chalky. Rolanda felt her heart clench; here she had been accusing Minerva of not grieving when the woman had quite obviously been grieving herself to death. “Why didn’t you say anything, Minerva?” she asked softly. “Why didn’t you let me know this sooner? I could have helped you--”
“You can do nothing for me, Rolanda, nor can anyone else. I trust that you will keep this to yourself; I needn’t anyone thinking I am an incapable Headmistress.”
“Minerva, no one is going to think any less of you because you are grieving over the loss of your best friend. We’re all grieving.” Rolanda watched as the anger returned to her friends eyes, and wondered what she had said wrong.
“You know nothing of grief, Rolanda. You all act as though life should just go on, that everything is okay. He’s gone, we miss him, but let’s move on! Well, I can’t just move on, Rolanda! I don’t know what you were expecting to accomplish by coming up here today, but I bloody well hope that you have gotten what you came for. You can go back and tell the others that the indifferent and heartless headmistress is not as cold as they all thought.”
“No one thinks you are heartless, Minerva. We’ve all been worried. I miss Albus too, but--”
“Stop it!” Minerva screeched, “Just stop it!”
Rolanda started, caught off guard by Minerva’s sudden outburst. Staring into her friends wide and tear-filled eyes, she realised that something had snapped. She could see in those green eyes a pain so deep it took her breath away, and a swirling of emotions that were about to be released; emotions that had been pent up for far too long, she was sure.
“Stop comparing what I’m feeling to what you and everyone else are feeling!” Minerva yelled, balling her fists in frustrations. “You are feeling nothing compared to what I am! You could have no idea what I am going through. You have no idea what it has been like since Albus was killed! Everyone talking about how proud I must be to be headmistress; to be the one that Albus chose to take over this school, what an honour it is, and how happy I must be with the increase in pay…. Well I would gladly give every knut I have if it would buy me one more moment with Albus! And the pride I have at being the one Albus chose as his successor is nothing, NOTHING compared to the pride I hold at having been the one he chose as his wife for over fifty years!”
“What?” Rolanda gasped in surprise, as Minerva’s eyes widened and she clapped her hand over her mouth. Minerva was shaking her head, as though in pure disbelief of what she had said, and Rolanda tried to wrap her mind around the words the woman had just spoken. She was speechless. She had never known that Minerva and Albus had been involved, let alone been married for over fifty years. She was feeling an overwhelming sense of guilt, and reached out to touch Minerva’s arm, but the woman jerked away.
“Don’t. Please,” she whispered. “It’s funny,” Minerva snorted bitterly, “we kept our entire relationship a secret. Albus insisted upon it of course, for my safety in the beginning, and then to protect me in the end from criticism, as people would surely start saying I had only gotten my position as Deputy because my husband was the headmaster. All those years, it never bothered me that I could tell no one of our relationship. I was content to be with Albus, and nothing else mattered. I knew that he loved me, so it didn’t matter if anyone else knew it or not; but on that day, when he--” Minerva let out a small sob, “when he died, I wished then that everyone knew. I wanted to scream it from every hill in England, and to the entire world for that matter. But I couldn’t. To say that we were married now would threaten my position as headmistress of this school, and Albus made it clear that if anything ever happened to him I would have to continue our secret, because he said Hogwarts needs me. While that may be true, I need him more than this school ever thought of needing anyone.”
Rolanda watched as the woman let out a heart-wrenching sob and sank to the floor, her shoulders shaking with grief.
“You don’t know what it’s like, Rolanda, to have lost the love of your life and not be able to openly mourn. I lost everything when I lost Albus, yet I have to pretend like I’m fine, like I merely lost a close friend and colleague. I have to endure the offhand comments about how Albus did things, or things that Albus said, and I have to pretend they don’t have a great impact on me, when in reality every little reminder tears me apart once more. I still half expect to find him lying next me when I awake in the middle night, expect to see him come to the Great Hall for meals. He doesn’t come back, Rolanda. He’ll never come back.”
Rolanda felt tears sliding down her own cheeks as she watched Minerva lose herself in her sobs, her face buried in her hands as she screamed a widow’s cry. Kneeling down beside her friend, Rolanda enfolded the shaking woman in her arms, relieved when she didn’t fight, and held her tightly, whispering nonsensical words of comfort. How long they stayed that way Rolanda didn’t know, but she felt her respect grow for the woman weeping in her arms. This woman was the strongest witch Rolanda could ever imagine possible. She couldn’t dream of being able to go through what Minerva had, or dealing with what Minerva was dealing with.
She stroked Minerva’s back soothingly, rocking slightly until the woman’s sobs turned to sniffles and she finally raised up slightly, drying her eyes on the corner of her sleeve.
“You’re a good friend, Rolanda,” Minerva said hoarsely, patting her gently on the arm.
Rolanda shook her head. “Were I a good friend, Minerva, I would have realised that there was something more to your behaviour than my original beliefs. I can’t apologise enough for the things that I said; I had no idea.”
“No one did, and that is how it was supposed to be, and I have to ask you to please not tell anyone what I have divulged to you. No one can know about mine and Albus’s marriage.”
“I won’t say anything; you have my word,” Rolanda said, tucking a lock of fallen hair behind Minerva’s ear. “I admire you, Minerva; your courage and strength. I know wherever Albus is, he’s proud of you. I’m proud of you.”
Minerva gave Rolanda’s hand a little squeeze. “Thank you, Rolanda; that means a lot.”
~*~
As promised, when Rolanda went back to report to Poppy, she told her only that she thought she had gotten through to Minerva, and that they would see an improvement, but she never mentioned the unknown marriage between their two friends and colleagues. Rolanda would never forget that night. She learned more about Minerva in those few moments than she had known in the entirety of their friendship, and she felt privileged to have been the one allowed to see past the indifferent exterior of the Hogwarts Headmistress, and into the heart of the secret widow.
~The End~
xXx 
